The Prince, the Poet and the Locker
by myLITTLEnekoSHIRO
Summary: It's the first day of school and cold-hearted Toshiro has a secret admirer! Is it his math teacher, Gin Ichimaru? Or could it be the school prince, Ichigo Kurasaki? Or maybe it could be the school bully, Grimmjow Jaguerjack?
1. The Love Triangle

there's not much smut in this but there are hints of it here and there. but i hope you enjoy!^^

'Toshiro!'

'What is it!?' the icy boy snaps at Hinamori as he slams his locker shut. No offense, he loves her like his sister but sometimes she can be a royal pain.

'The Prince is coming!' she squeals and begins doing a happy dance. Toshiro rolls his eyes. She was making it pretty obvious that she had a major crush on the super good-looking prince of Karakura High School. But then again, which girl didn't?

'There's nothing _amazing_ about him anyways,' Toshiro thinks to himself. 'He's just an arrogant kid who knows how to use his good looks to his advantage. And that is just ridiculous.'

'There he is!' Hinamori whispers excitedly and begins to point at a tall figure sauntering down the hallway with his posse. Toshiro quickly pushes her hand down and glares at her. No need to attract attention!

Ichigo Kurasaki has his hands in his pockets, his unusual orange hair spiking up in all directions, giving him an out-of-bed look. All the girls in the hall hold their breath as he walks by and when he gave them a small smile, they all sigh romantically, a few even fainting. Toshiro can't help but roll his eyes again. Girls! They see a good-looking guy and go all goofy. Well they do say love makes you do stupid things. Toshiro just hopes he never falls for anyone. God forbid he was caught swooning over some girl! That would be embarrassing not to mention a waste of time.

Being in love or having a crush is something of an irritation to him. It basically means you spend an unnecessary amount of time trying to impress someone when deep down you know it's not going to work out and will end up heartbroken. So to sum it up, falling in love just meant getting hurt. And he didn't want to be a fool and fall for love's diabolical trap.

Ichigo is now level with them. He observes them from the corner of his eye for a millisecond. Then, he winks. Hinamori gasps while Toshiro just crosses his arms and scowls at the 'prince'. Ichigo smirks at their reaction and continues to walk on without a backwards glance. Once he rounds the corner and disappears, Toshiro sweeps an eye over the hallway to see the aftereffects of the prince's presence.

Most of the girls are still in a daze and even a few guys are staring longingly at the corner he disappeared around as if wishing him to come back. Toshiro gives the guys a disgusted look. Not that he has anything against gays but it made him shudder to think of a _guy_ having a crush on another _guy_. It's bad enough falling for someone of the opposite sex but of the same?! It just sounded sick and wrong!

'Hi, Toshiro!' comes a friendly voice behind him and a hand clamps on his shoulder. He swivels his head around to see Izuru beaming at him. 'Even from a distance I could tell you were fighting the urge to punch Prince Ichigo in the face.'

'He needs a dent in that pretty boy face of his,' Toshiro mutters broodingly.

'So you say. You know you can lighten up! It's the first day back at school! Give Prince Ichigo a break. You've been hating him since last year.'

'Izuru! Didja see that? Didja see what Prince Ichigo did to me!?' Hinamori babbles in ecstasy, practically walking on air. Izuru gives a forced smile and looks at Toshiro in confusion.

'Humour her,' Toshiro says exasperately. The bell rings for class.

'Alright, so he was walking by, see, and then he stopped,' she launches into full story mode with hand movements. 'Like he actually stopped! And then, he looked at me and he _winked_! I'm not lying! Don't give me that look like I'm crazy! I know a wink when I see a wink! And he _winked_ at _me_! ohmygodohmygodohmygodddd!! Prince Ichigo Kurasaki winked at me!'

'Prince Ichigo winked at _you_?' Rukia scoffs as the trio enters class. She places her hand on her hip and gives Hinamori a haughty look. 'Like he'd give _you_ the time of day when he can spend time with a girl like _me_.'

She flips her hair back and sticks her nose in the air. Hinamori gives her dagger looks and opens her mouth to say something but Toshiro grabs her arm to pull her back.

'Rukia, Ichigo doesn't even know you exist except for the fact you do his homework so I'd watch my mouth right now,' he says casually and takes his seat at the front of the class. Rukia goes red.

'Pipsqueak,' she hisses at him and plops down in her seat angrily. Toshiro curls his hands into fists and ignores the comment. It's not like it's the first time someone's commented about his height. Sure he's the shortest kid in school but he excels in his studies further than anyone his age. He was even offered a chance to go on a scholarship to one of the best universities in Japan but he refused. Toshiro likes where he is and he wouldn't trade anything in the whole world for what he has. Except maybe a formula for growing taller…

Toshiro snaps back to reality to the sound of someone writing with chalk on the blackboard. The person is tall and thin, dressed in an elegant suit. He has shoulder-length silvery-purple hair and he has his back to the class. Toshiro is actually curious to see what this person looks like from the front.

'Good morning, class,' says the stranger in a pleasant voice. A chill runs up Toshiro's back. There was something creepy about that tone of voice. 'I'll be your maths teacher this semester. My name is Gin Ichimaru.'

The man turns around to grin broadly at his class. He's got very delicate features but what are most peculiar about his face are his eyes. They seem to be slits without the slightest show of his irises. Toshiro can't help feel uncomfortable around this guy. There is something off about him…

'Well, since I've introduced myself! Why don't you all do me the favour of introducing yourselves,' their new teacher announces, sounding a little too happy for a normal person.

'He's so creepy,' a girl whispers to her partner.

'Yea but you gotta admit, he's pretty cute,' the other one whispers back and sighs.

One by one, everyone introduces themselves to Gin Ichimaru. When it comes to Toshiro, he fixes Gin with a callous look as if to say 'don't mess with me just cuz I'm short'.

'Hitsugaya Toshiro,' he says.

Gin eyes linger (or so it seems like) on him for a bit before smiling slyly and moving on to Izuru next to him. That's when Toshiro realized his heart was pounding rapidly against his chest. Surprised, Toshiro looks at Gin again and his heart starts racing even faster as the man glances at him before turning to the board to start the lesson. Toshiro stares in bewilderment at his head before looking down at his desk. He flattens his hands on the surface of his table and takes deep breaths. When his heart finally calms down, he takes out his notebook to work.

'No way,' he thinks furiously as he scribbles away, refusing to look at his teacher. 'No way did that just happen. He's my freaking teacher, not mention a _guy_. Snap out of it, Hitsugaya! You don't have time for stupid crushes like this. There is no way you are going to fall for _any_ guy.'

* * *

'I want him.'

Renji Abarai looks at his leader, Prince Ichigo, in surprise.

'Who?!' he asks dumbfoundedly. After all, Ichigo seems to have said it out of the blue while they all are relaxing at their regular lunch table.

'Him.' Ichigo points languidly at the cafeteria entrance. Renji follows his finger and blanches.

'Hitsugaya?!' he blurts out, his eyes popping. Ichigo nods and sighs as he leans back in his chair. Renji stares at him now. No offense, Ichigo is the sexiest guy in school and he can have any girl he wants. But the truth is, not many people know that he's gay. Only his close friends like Renji, Uryu and Chad, not to mention his ex-boyfriends.

His ex's were all big, broad guys. Renji should know. He was one of them. He never got over Ichigo completely but as long as he got to be near him, he didn't mind not dating this amazing specimen of a man. And now, he's interested in a guy like Toshiro??

'So,' Ichigo gives a yawn and looks at Renji slyly. 'Can you hook me up?'

'Welllllll,' Renji stutters and scratches the back of his head. 'Everyone knows Toshiro. And they all know he doesn't like…dating.'

'I can change that.'

'He's especially against dating _guys_.'

'Oh.' Ichigo's shoulders slump. Renji has never seen his leader look so devastated.

'But like you said, maybe you can change that,' he says quickly, his heart aching to see Ichigo so upset. Ichigo's face brightens.

'Yea, maybe I can,' he says shrewdly, rubbing his chin in thought. He glances at Toshiro and makes a face. 'Ugh, there goes that idiotic blue-headed bastard again. Honestly, doesn't he have anything better to do than to pick on Toshiro?!'

Renji looks in that direction and sees Grimmjow Jaguerjack has slammed Toshiro's lunch tray out of his hand. Toshiro is glaring at him angrily and mutters something that turns the bully's smile into a sneer.

'Well, Ichigo, that guy isn't exactly popular like you.'

'True, true. Who would give _that_ guy the time of day?!'

* * *

'Back off, Jaguerjack!' Toshiro snarls as Izuru grabs his shirt to stop him from pouncing on the sneering bully.

'You should watch where you're going, shortstuff,' Grimmjow taunts as he jams his hands in his pockets.

'Me?! You were the one that knocked my tray out of my hands!' Toshiro explodes, going red.

'Easy there, Toshiro,' Izuru whispers in his ear. 'Just walk away before you get detention on your first day. Remember, you already got a record from last year.'

Toshiro hisses at Grimmjow before he stopped struggling and bent down to pick up his tray. Grimmjow snickers as he strolls by. It took every ounce of his energy not to trip the blue idiot. But he didn't want another red mark on his profile. His grades aren't going to help keep him in school forever.

'Nice going, Shiro-chan,' Hinamori whispers to him as he gets up. Although he is brimming with rage, he doesn't get mad when she calls him that. She's the only one who has the privilege of calling him that. It shows the intensity of their bond.

'I don't get him,' Izuru wonders. 'Why does he go out of his way to pick on you?'

* * *

'What an idiot,' Grimmjow chuckles to himself as he joins his group at their table.

'So you finished picking on your prey, Grimmjow?' Nnoitra muses wickedly. Stark snores loudly as he sleeps. Lillinette kicks him but he continues to sleep peacefully.

'That never works, Lillinette,' Grimmjow says lazily. 'Hitsugaya is fun. His reactions make me wanna do it again and again.' Nnoitra laughs.

'I should try it sometime,' he begins to say but stops when Grimmjow gives him a deadly look.

'Hey,' he says softly and everyone on the table goes silent. 'He's my prey so back off. Got it?'

Nnoitra opens his mouth to protest but the look on Grimmjow's face is so intense he stops and just nods. What is with Grimmjow?

'They won't understand,' Grimmjow meditates. 'Why I pick on him. What would they say if they found out that that little icy boy makes my heart pound and my hands go all sweaty? That I just want to grab him and do things to him?' He looks at Toshiro with his friends and how he broods over his meal, smiling at his friend's jokes once in a while. 'Yea, they can _never_ find out…'


	2. Forbidden Fruit

Toshiro looks at his locker in disgust. Lord knows what he'd left in it before the summer holidays! Maybe it's that sandwich with the peanut butter and fish paste his grandma had accidently slathered together and expected him to eat it at school. He shudders. Imagining it all moldy and rotting away in his locker made his stomach turn. He takes a deep breath and gives his locker the evil eye. It's now or never.

'Jeez, Toshiro, all you have to do is open a locker not wage war against Sparta or something,' Hisagi says sarcastically as he punches his locker so that it pops open. Toshiro rolls his eyes. God, it must be 'eye-rolling' day for him or something! Either that or people were just being plain idiots today. He'll go with the second option.

He swirls the knob to his locker combination. He can't forget it. 10101999. It's a day he can't forget. No matter how hard he tries…

His locker swings open with a loud _creak_. Ugh! Hanatoro always forgets to oil the hinges of the lockers! Anyways, at least his locker didn't smell like a rotting garbage dump. Toshiro smirks when he notices his pile of school books from last year. Looking at them now, he can't believe he'd found these subjects hard to master! Now, he can recite the Laws of Physics as if he had swallowed the textbook. Perks of having a photographic memory…

That's when he notices something odd about his pile of books. There, placed neatly on top of them, is a scrap of paper neatly folded into a square. Curious, he picks it up, not remembering having left it there before the holidays.

'Strange,' he wonders as he unfolds the paper. He smoothes it out and notices it has writing on it and it is definitely not his. In fact, it is very unfamiliar to him. He brings it up to his face and begins to read softly:

_It's a forbidden love,_

_Like the forbidden fruit_

_Of Heaven._

_We can look but not touch;_

_Touch but not eat;_

_Eat but not swallow;_

_Swallow but not savor;_

_Savor but not enjoy;_

_Enjoy but not for long._

_There are rules,_

_And then there are rules._

_Who decides for us?_

_Who decides if there can be an 'us'?_

_I don't know, I don't know…_

_It's a forbidden love,_

_Like the forbidden fruit_

_of Heaven._

Toshiro snorts. He balls it up and throws it to the floor behind him. He then continues to load his books into the locker for this year. That's when he feels a light tap on his shoulder. He turns around to see Hinamori giving a knowing look, the piece of scrunched up paper in her hand.

'Littering, Shiro-chan? Are you serious?' she says exasperately. Toshiro groans. He forgot how much of a neat freak and goody two shoes Hinamori can be. 'What is this anyway?'

'Nothing big. Some stupid prank by the looks of it,' Toshiro says in a bored voice and reaches forward to snatch it from her hands but she has already opened it to begin read. She pours over it for a while and Toshiro stands by, tapping his foot impatiently. 'Momo! Do you want me to throw it or not?! I'm gonna be late for class!'

'You want to throw _this_ away, Shiro-chan?!' she asks in bewilderment, tears in her eyes. She clutches the paper to her chest and squeals. 'It's so beautiful and full of emotion and love! Ooooooo! Shiro-chan! You have a secret admirer!'

'Whatever, Momo,' he says, irritated and blushes slightly. He grabs the paper and scrunches it up again. 'Like I said, it's probably a practical joke. I'm used to being ridiculed in case you haven't noticed.'

'Well nobody would make the effort and time to write something as cute as that!' Momo insists. She touches his hand with the paper in it and curls his fingers around it. She smiles at him. 'I know you've been hurt, Shiro-chan, but pretty things like this come once in a while and it's best we take them before they disappear. Maybe this is a prank, but don't let that blind you in enjoying the meaning. In case you didn't notice, this poem talks about being hurt and being denied love. You can relate, you know?'

The bell rings impatiently as if warning them about punishments if they miss class.

'Hinamori! Come on! You know how Kenpachi can be if we're late for class!' Soifon yells as she runs past her to class. Momo begins to walk away from him, still smiling.

'At least keep it for my sake, Shiro-chan,' she says reassuringly and races off. Toshiro watches her leave and looks back at his fist. He opens it and raises his eyebrow as he looks at the pieces of paper. He sighs and stuffs it into his back pocket. He grabs his book bag and heads for the biology lab, slamming his locker shut on the way.

Izuru waves to him and indicates to a seat next to him. Toshiro makes towards him when a foot sticks out and trips him. Surprised, he begins to fall forward on his face but manages to grab a table before he fell. Regaining his balance, he looks back angrily at his attacker and isn't surprised when he sees Grimmjow's grinning face.

'Whoops,' Grimmjow sneers. 'My foot musta slipped.'

'Shouldn't apologize,' Toshiro says through gritted teeth. 'You can't help being a retard once you're born one, can you?'

Grimmjow stands up and his eyes narrow into slits. He stands a good 3 feet over Toshiro but the spunky guy isn't perturbed by the height difference. He was almost as scary as Grimmjow because of the wrathful aura he is exuding. All the students step back, uneasy of a fight occurring at that moment.

'Say that again, pipsqueak,' Grimmjow murmurs dangerously. Toshiro glares right up in his face.

'Your mom musta been pretty depressed when she saw you came out,' Toshiro snaps. Grimmjow's hands begin to curl at his sides.

'Settle down class, settle down!' Professor Ukitake says briskly as he walks in and takes his places behind his desk.

'How ya been, professor?!' Kiyone Kotetsu asks. It's no secret that Professor Ukitake suffers from tuberculosis and had to be hospitalized last year. Professor Ukitake smiles pleasantly.

'Why thank you for asking, Kiyone!' he exclaims. 'I'm doing much better than last time. Now, since it is the first day-!'

'Nonsense, professor!' Sentaro Kotsubaki exclaims and glares at Kiyone. 'You should rest and relax! We'll help carry out this lesson for you!'

'That won't be necessary, Sentaro,' Ukitake says, his happy tone dropping a notch and a sweat drop forms on the side of his head. 'I am perfectly capable of carrying out this class by myself-!'

'No, no, professor!' Kiyone says loudly and sticks her tongue out at Sentaro. 'Can I get you a pillow? A snack? A refreshment?'

'I'll get it!' Sentaro says hurriedly and rushes forward but falls flat on his face as Kiyone trips him.

'Oh no you don't!' she says angrily. 'Don't take credit for _my_ work, Kotsubaki!'

'You just like to upstage me all the time, Kotetsu!'

'HA! Sez you!'

'You wanna bet on it!'

The class groans. Another well-known fact is how much the two of them compete to suck up to Professor Ukitake. At first, it was just funny but now, it was becoming a slight irksome not only for the teacher but for the students as well. Still, it helped speed up the lesson. Professor Ukitake coughs to get the attention of the two bickering students.

'If you two can carry this on some other time, I would like to continue with my class,' he says gently.

'Of course, professor!' Kiyone chirps and sits back on her stool. 'I know _**I **_can!' she smirks at Sentaro who is just fuming. He opens his mouth to say something but upon noticing the look of exasperation on Ukitake's face, he closes his mouth and sits back on his seat, sending dagger looks to Kiyone.

'As I was saying,' Ukitake starts. 'It's the start of a new year and a new year means you all get to learn new and interesting topics in biology! But instead of sticking to the usual teaching style, I thought we'd start this year but something completely different! A project!'

Everyone leans forward in interest. Professor Ukitake is not a boring teacher and he always came up with new and interesting ways of making studying fun. That's why it's one of Toshiro's favorite classes. It's also his least favorite cuz his worst enemy sat just a few feet away and constantly threw spit balls at him. Speaking of which, he rakes his hand at the back of his head and came up with a wad of wet paper. He turns around to glower at Grimmjow, who just smiles and waves his spitball straw at him.

'In this project, you pair up with just one person and get to choose any topic you want to cover from the new syllabus list,' Ukitake continues. 'That way, you'll finish your syllabus faster, you'll learn more and we'll have more time to go on field trips. So is everyone in?'

The class began to buzz with excitement. This was actually going to be fun! Izuru nudges Toshiro.

'Let's pair up,' he whispers and smiles. Toshiro nods in agreement. He feels another spitball hit him in the back of his head and he grits his teeth. Grimmjow was hitting his last nerve…

'But here's the catch, class,' Ukitake says mischievously. '_**I **_get to choose your partners for you. And before you say anything, it's all part of the project's learning aspect. It seems some of us don't get along with each other (he eyes Kiyone and Sentaro) so the best way to get to know each other is by working with each other. Is everybody with me? Alright. I've made a list and I'm going to read it out. Kiyone, in case you haven't guessed, you're with Sentaro. Izuru, you're with Ikkaku. Nanao…'

'Aw, man!' Izuru huffs. 'Guess we ain't partners, huh?'

'It's alright,' Toshiro says reassuringly. 'At least our partners will be reasonable, hard-working…'

'Toshiro, you're with Grimmjow.'

'WHAT!?'

Both guys stand him, hands on their tables and their eyes wide in shock.

'I'm not pairing up with him!' they both say in unison and then glare at each other. 'Do you know what he's like? We hate each other! Stop copying me!'

Ukitake coughs again.

'Now, boys,' he says firmly. 'My decision is final. Unless you want to opt out and fail, it's your choice. Otherwise be happy with what you have.'

Toshiro makes a noise like he wants to argue but thinks otherwise and sits back down, his arms crossed and an angry expression set on his face. Grimmjow does likewise. He hates this as much as Toshiro does but he barely passed last year and he needs this grade to make up for his horrible grades.

'This is really not fair,' he whispers but Toshiro hears him and snaps.

'You think this is unfair on you!?' he shoots at him and stands up to face him now. 'I'm stuck with _you_ of all people!? How do you think I feel, you idiot!'

Grimmjow growls as he slowly raises from his seat. Ukitake coughs again but instead of stopping, he continues until there is blood in his hand. Kiyone cries out and jumps from her seat to aide her beloved professor. Sentaro follows suit.

'I'll help you, professor!' she cries out with emotion.

'Not if I help you first!'

'Stop sucking up, Kotsubaki!'

'I will when you will!'

The entire class just shrugs its shoulders and watch the commotion in amusement. Izuru sighs and holds back Toshiro from jumping on Grimmjow while Ulquiorra and Syazel hold back Grimmjow.

'It's gonna be one hell of a year!' he thinks.


	3. Why Do We Fall In Love

'And that is how you differentiate your sum and still have time to doodle a cartoon on the side of your paper,' Gin Ichimaru states as he scribbles the answer to the equation and finishes up a kooky cartoon drawing on the side of the board. The guys guffaw at the drawing on the board while the girls giggle at his sense of humor and quietly copy the sum while sneaking glances at him.

'What a show-off,' Izuru mutters to Toshiro.

'Hm?' Toshiro answers listlessly as he stares mesmerized at his math teacher brush his hair lightly off his face. The very action causes butterflies to flutter in his tummy. He quickly shakes his head to snap out of it. He scowls. What is wrong with him?! Wasn't he working on _not _falling for his teacher! Then why the hell is he drooling over his perfectly sculpted toned body and lush locks of hair and…there he goes again! He blushes outwardly at even thinking about his teacher like that! Izuru gives him as curious look.

'You ok, Toshiro? Your face is the color of a persimmon,' he says with concern.

'I'm fine, Izuru, it's kinda stuffy in here,' Toshiro says hotly and fiddles with his uniform collar. Izuru looks at the air conditioner right in front of Toshiro. He raises an eyebrow. Thankfully, the bell rings. Toshiro lets out a sigh of relief and quickly jumps to his feet before anyone else does, everything packed in his book bag and ready to leave.

'Alright everyone finish up this section 'cuz tomorrow we're moving on to the harder sums in the next chapter and I don't want complaints that I'm being a slave driver!' Gin announces as he shuffles his papers together on his desk. He smirks at Toshiro. 'Don't be such an eager beaver to leave, Toshiro-kun, I have a few words to say to you so stay back.'

Toshiro's heart leaps into his throat. Izuru gives him a small smile before he hurries out. Hinamori would have said something cheerful if she wasn't arguing with Rukia about whose hair was more luscious. Toshiro watches as his math teacher continues arranging his papers on the table. One flutter to the floor and as he bends down to pick it up, he sticks his ass in the air and Toshiro has to bite his lip to prevent a lustful moan from escaping from them. He covers his face with one hand, trying to block the image and stop himself from thinking about Gin in _that_ way.

'So, Toshiro-kun,' Gin starts. Toshiro's heart skips a beat when he hears the man say his name.

'I'm a guy, I'm a guy, I'm a _straight_ guy who likes girls and am _through_ with dating,' Toshiro chants in his head, wishing his heart to stop beating so hard against his ribcage as Gin drew closer to him. Gin hands him a piece of paper with time slots scribbled on it. Toshiro stares at it in confusion.

'I've heard of your abilities, Toshiro-kun,' he says softly. 'And I'm impressed. I have yet to meet a child prodigy in mathematics at such a young age.'

'How old do you think I am?' Toshiro exclaims and scowls. Gin smiles pleasantly. He's making fun of little Toshiro!

'That is of no importance,' he says matter-of-factly and crosses his arms. 'I've arranged with the school to hold extra classes with you after school in my office. I want to test your skills before I take it a step further in class. You seem to be moving faster than your classmates so I want to see if I should teach you at their pace or your own. So will you comply?'

Toshiro nods mechanically. He looks down at his paper and when he looks up he gasps. Gin is directly towering over him and so close he can smell his cologne: musk. He jumps back. Gin looks at him, his eyebrows lost in his hair and his mouth still in that mocking grin.

'Is something wrong, Toshiro-kun?' he asks in an amused tone. Toshiro feels like he's run a marathon. His palms are getting sweaty and his heart is beating so loud he's surprised Gin can't hear it. Gin reaches out a hand to place on his shoulder but Toshiro quickly opens the door behind him and bows slightly to Gin.

'Thank you, Ichimaru-san, but I have a class and I'm running late so I have to go so bye and thank you for the opportunity!' he babbles hurriedly and zips out of the rooms. He doesn't stop running until he is clutching his locker and breathing hard.

'That was close,' he gasps out loud. If Gin had actually touched him, Toshiro didn't know whether he would pass out or jump on him. He bangs his head on his locker. He is such a douche!

'What was close?' Hisagi says as he pokes his head out from behind his locker.

'Mind your own business, Hisagi!' Toshiro snaps. This is _not _turning out to be a good day for him. His breathing slowly comes down and he whirls in his locker combination. As he shifts through his books to find his physics book, a slip of paper flutters out of his locker and lands near his feet. He picks it up, thinking it's a test paper but soon finds out it's not even near that. As he scans through the paper, he realizes it's another poem.

_**Why do we fall in love?**_

_**You mean why do YOU fall in love.**_

_**Why don't we love others back?**_

_**You mean why don't YOU love others back.**_

_**Why can't we tell the truth?**_

_**You mean why can't YOU tell the truth.**_

_**Why do we write about love?**_

_**You mean why do YOU write about love.**_

_**Why do we get hurt?**_

_**You mean why do YOU get hurt.**_

_**Why do we do this?**_

…

_**Did I ask the wrong question?**_

_**No.**_

_**You asked the RIGHT question.**_

'What the hell?' he thinks angrily. Toshiro is not in the mood to neither enjoy this poem nor understand it. He had almost made a fool of himself in front of Gin and here is someone preaching to him about love. Did this person even know who he was sending love poems too?! He angrily pulls out a pen from his bag and writes furiously on the paper.

'Leave…me…alone…!' he mutters as he writes. Once done, he scrunches up the paper and thrusts it into his locker, slamming it shut. 'There! That'll teach you to mess with me!'

'What's the matter, Toshiro, locker bullying you now?' comes a cool voice from behind. He quickly swivels around and scowls when he sees Ichigo's calm and demure face looking down on him. He's surrounded by his usual posse of Renji, Chad, Kaien and what not. Toshiro crosses his arms across his chest. He was not in the mood for a gang-up from 'Prince' Ichigo of all people right now.

'What do you want, Kurasaki?' he asks coldly. A locker slams next to him. Hisagi looks up and upon seeing Renji, he drops his books.

'H-H-Hi, Renji,' he stammers and blushes bright red as he bends to pick up his books. Renji gives him a weird look. 'I-I better be going and all and…I'll see you later…'

Renji raises his hand in acknowledgment which makes Hisagi blush even harder as he clutches his books even tighter and hurries off in the opposite direction, leaving Toshiro all alone with Ichigo and his gang.

'I always knew he was weird,' Uryu whispers to Chad. Chad nods in agreement. Ichigo clears his throat and Uryu immediately comes to attention.

'Toshiro Hitsugaya,' he says formally. 'Prince Ichigo would like to invite you to sit with him at his table today at lunch time. Please accept his offer.'

'Really?' Toshiro scoffs and raises his eyebrow at Ichigo's confidently smiling face. He bares his teeth at him. 'Well if 'Prince' Ichigo wants to ask me to his table, he should ask himself. But even if he does, I _don't _have lunch with stuck-up snobs. Hard to stomach food then. So catch ya lot later. Or not.'

With that, the little ice boy shoves Uryu aside and stomps away from them.

'What a bastard, I swear,' he curses under his breath. 'You'd probably find his face near the word 'jackass' in the dictionary.'

'Don't take it badly, Prince Ichigo,' Renji says soothingly and pats his leader on the shoulder. Ichigo shrugs his hand away and pinches the bridge of his nose.

'Ugh, he really likes playing hard to get, doesn't he?' he says, with a hint of amusement in his voice. He looks up at his gang and smiles a little. 'Good. I like 'em feisty. It makes getting them all the more worthwhile. But little Toshiro is proving to be quite a hassle. What else do I have to do to woe him over?'

He glances at Toshiro's locker and smirks.


	4. Can I Help It?

Hinamori places a bowl of salad on her tray and a glass of water. Izuru comes hurrying into the cafeteria, stuffing papers into his bag.

'Where were you?' Toshiro asks.

'Huh?! Oh, Shunsui-san wouldn't let us go until we finished the balcony scene of 'Romeo and Juliet'.' He rolls his eyes and puts his hand on his chest dramatically. ''But soft! What light through yonder window breaks? It is the East and Juliet is the sun!' His eyes then trail to Momo's tray.

'What are you at? On some kind of diet or what?' he teases and she glares at him.

'I just realized I had gained a few extra pounds over the summer and I want to drop a dress size,' she sniffs and turns her nose up as she turns her back on Izuru.

'Hey, c'mon, Hinamori! I was only kidding! You don't even look fat from any angle!'Izuru says hastily and grabs his tray loaded with food to follow her.

'Really?' she says and brightens as she looks longingly at a plate of French fries.

'Yea! Except for the time you broke a chair in gym when you sat on it, I don't think you're fat at all!' Izuru says confidently and gets bashed in the head by Hinamori.

'Thanks a lot, Izuru!' she snaps as Izuru rubs a huge bruise forming on his head.

'Will you guys quit it? You're fighting over an utterly ridiculous topic,' Toshiro says in a tired voice as he joins them with his tray. 'Momo, you're not fat. Rukia is just saying that to piss you off. You don't have to listen to her.'

'I know, Shiro-chan, but what if I am fat!? I mean, I couldn't fit into my fencing uniform yesterday!' she wails in despair. She happens to be very sensitive about her weight.

'That's only because you've grown a couple of inches, Momo!'

'How can you tell?! You're still as short as ever to me, Shiro-chan! Oops!'

'Momo!'

'Sorry, sorry!'

'If you guys are done, you'll see that someone has stolen our table!' Izuru says bitterly and indicates to their table where a group of giggling 10th graders is sitting gossiping away.

'Kwaaaa!' Momo cries out. 'Now where are we going to sit?'

Toshiro scans the packed cafeteria and suddenly spots Ichigo waving a hand to him. He quickly looks away as if pretending he didn't see him but Momo spots Ichigo. She squeals and sways in place.

'Prince Ichigo is calling us to sit with him!' she squeaks and rushes forward.

'Maybe we shouldn't,' Toshiro says grudgingly but he follows Momo anyways.

'Aw come on, Shiro-chan!' she says excitedly. 'It's Prince Ichigo! Imagine Rukia going green with envy!' She laughs out loud and winks at a stunned Rukia as she takes a seat next to Chad opposite Ichigo. Rukia certainly goes green with a tinge of red. She constantly glanced at their table while trying to concentrate on what Orihime was saying. Hinamori giggles evilly. Toshiro just glares at her as he approaches the table. He makes to sit next to Izuru but Ichigo scoots over and he's pulled next to him by Renji. Looks like he has no choice but to sit next to the 'Prince'.

'So, Toshiro, what's your favorite pastime?' Ichigo inquires and gives him his full attention as Toshiro raises his burger to take a bite.

'Wuff'in 'oo 'ike to 'ow,' Toshiro says with his mouth full. He swallows and turns to Ichigo, about to answer properly, when he feels something riding up his leg. He jumps and bangs his knee on the table. As he rubs his sore knee, he feels the same thing ride up his leg again. He looks down and sees _Ichigo's _foot rubbing his leg. His eyes widen and he moves his legs away.

'So what were you saying, Toshiro?' Ichigo purrs. Toshiro looks at his only two friends on the table but Momo is busy chatting with Chad (well Chad is just listening while she jabbered away) and Izuru is sitting uncomfortably between Uryuu and Kaien, who are both giving him shifty looks. Nobody just noticed Ichigo make a move on poor Toshiro.

'I said,' Toshiro stammers, trying to regain himself. 'Wouldn't you like to know?'

'Oh I would, Toshiro, I would,' Ichigo flirts. Toshiro takes a deep breath and glances at Momo from the corner of his eye. He'll have to bear with this just for her. No matter how much he hated Ichigo. He expected Ichigo to sort of hold a grudge against him too since Toshiro was never nice to him. But Ichigo seemed oblivious to the fact that Toshiro detests him.

'What's wrong with you, Kurasaki? You're acting bizarre,' Toshiro states, pretending not to be bothered and returns to munching on his burger. He suddenly feels a hand on his thigh and he almost chokes on his burger. He looks at Ichigo in disbelief. No way. The Prince of Karakura High School couldn't be…

Ichigo winks at him as if he knows what Toshiro is thinking about. He leans forward so his lips are barely inches from Toshiro's ear. He breathes on it, sending shivers up the boy's spine.

'Maybe there is, little Toshiro,' he whispers seductively. 'And you're the only one who can cure it…'

Toshiro immediately springs up from the table, causing the entire group to look up at him in surprise. Ichigo just wears a bored expression and leans his cheek against his hand as he looks up at Toshiro's fuming face.

'Kurasaki, I am warning you,' Toshiro says lowly so only Ichigo can hear him, his body shaking with anger and his eyes refuses to focus on that arrogant face. He spots a familiar head of black hair and when the person turns around, his heart literally stops. He quickly sits back, daring not to look at Ichigo or at anyone else.

'Please don't see me, please don't see me,' he thinks pleadingly, eyes squeezed shut.

'Hey, Toshiro?'

He flinches as his heart does a back flip. He looks up after a second to stare into a face of Karin. Her eyes are looking into his teal ones as if searching for something. Her black mane framed her face which shows concern. His hands ball into fists as if he is trying to control something inside him.

'I gotta split, Ichigo,' Toshiro says, ignoring Karin. 'Thanks for the invite.'

With that, he walks away quickly, leaving Karin very confused and very hurt. She notices the entire table is staring at her except Momo and Izuru.

'What are you lot looking at?! Haven't you seen a girl before?!' she snaps and stomps away. Ichigo gives her a curious look.

'Who's that?' he asks Momo and Izuru.

'Nobody,' Izuru says a little too quickly and gives Momo a look that she should stay quiet too. Ichigo smirks and turns to Momo completely. She's looking down at her bowl of salad, furiously jabbing at the lettuce leaves. He gently takes her hand in his, lifts her chin so she looked at him and he flashed his heart-melting smile that made girls swoon.

'Come, Hinamori, won't you tell me?' he says innocently. Hinamori whimpers. Izuru groans. Ichigo has her hook, line and sinker.

'Her name's Karin,' Hinamori starts jabbering away at high speed. 'She and Toshiro used to go out last year but they broke up during the summer. She broke his heart and because of that Toshiro doesn't want to go out with any girl ever again.'

'What did she do?' Ichigo asks curiously. Momo hesitates. She looks at Izuru who shakes his head sadly.

'I-I'm sorry, Prince Ichigo,' she manages to say. 'But, that's Toshiro's secret. And only he can tell you what exactly happened between them…'

'That's alright, Hinamori,' Ichigo says lightly and releases her hand. She looks at him in a daze and then at her hand. She squeals and awes at the hand that he had just touched. Behind her, Rukia has fainted and her nose is bleeding as Orihime fans her with her hands.

'Poor Toshiro no wonder he repels my advances,' Ichigo thinks sympathetically. 'Well, I'll make him come around yet. He can't stay single forever.'

* * *

Toshiro leans his head on his locker and sighs, willing tears to stop forming in his eyes. He was just fine before she came along. Why did she have to show her face to him after what she did to him? He's working on getting over her and just when he thinks he's finally cured, she shows up. Of course he was bound to see her face once he got back to school but he didn't expect her to have the guts to come up and talk to him. Not after what she did. Not after she had hurt him so bad he had even tried to drink rat poison. Thank God Izuru had shown up and stopped him. Thanks to Izuru, he could heal himself to face her again once school started again. But after seeing her face again, the pain he has been trying to suppress couldn't help fighting to come to the surface.

He breathes deeply. He's going to be alright. She's just a bitch who broke his heart and doesn't deserve him even wasting his time thinking about her. He'll just collect his homework and leave school early. He doesn't have any more classes so he doesn't have to hang around here anymore. As he opens his locker, he cries out in alarm and steps back to avoid being buried in an avalanche of red roses. He stares in disbelief at the gorgeous flowers catch the light of the sun and twinkle with the dew hung on their petals. He loves roses. But who the heck knew that? He notices a blue card perched on his books. He picks it up, reads it and groans.

_**You're as sweet as these roses, Toshiro. Please accept them.**_

_**From your secret admirer,**_

_**The Prince.**_

'What…a…git,' he murmurs but can't help smile as he picks up a rose and smells it. He sweeps an eye over his locker and notices the scrunched up paper with the poem lying there in the corner.

'What if it's Ichiog who's been sending me poem all this time?' he thinks suspiciously as he unfolds the paper and gasps. There's his message. But under that is a new poem. A shorter one this time.

_**Can I help it,**_

_**If I feel this way?**_

_**Can I help it,**_

_**You don't noticed me?**_

_**Can I help it,**_

_**That it hurts?**_

_**Can I help it,**_

_**That I still want you?**_

Toshiro takes a sharp intake of breath before sliding down to the floor next to the pile of roses. He then realizes that his heart is beating rapidly, like when he's near Gin. Could this really be Ichigo? Toshiro wasn't aware of the face that he could write beautiful poetry like this. Well, that mystery will have to wait to be solved. Right now, Toshiro just wanted to revel in the thrill of having a secret admirer who wrote exquisite poetry that touched him deeply.

_OH yeah! people! here, Karin is NOT, i repeat, NOT Ichigo's sister!! alright, please enjoy the rest of the story!^^_


	5. What We Do To Hide What We Feel

Tapping his foot impatiently, Toshiro paced in front of the library entrance and glanced at his watch. Where is he?! He hears footsteps slowly approaching the building. He reels his head up to scowl at the blue-haired idiot strolling up to the building with an annoying grin plastered across his face and his hands at the back of his head.

'You're late,' Toshiro says shortly and turns away to enter the library.

'Hey, c'mon! I picked up a snack!' Grimmjow protests and waves a bag of doughnuts in the air.

'No food allowed inside.' Toshiro taps the 'Food Forbidden' sign on the door and sighs. 'Grimmjow, I just wanna get this over with so please, while we're still young?'

Grimmjow frowns and sulks as he stuffs his bag of treats in to his school bag. Save them for later. He jams his hands into his pockets as he follows the shrimp through the maze of bookshelves. Grimmjow whistles.

'Wow,' he utters as he sweeps an eye over the rows and rows of books. 'There's a book on everything in here!'

'I guess that explains your lack of a brain,' Toshiro can't help saying as he pulls various books from their places. Grimmjow sticks his tongue out at him and then sighs bitterly.

He's supposed to hate him. It's never been hard for him to hate anyone but then along comes Toshiro and breaks his streak. He can still remember when he first laid eyes on the little tyke. He had arrived at Karakura High School just last year. He had been standing uncomfortably with his schedule and utterly lost. He knew nobody and nobody knew him. Not like he minded. Even in his last school, he had been something of a loner. Even in a new surrounding, he didn't feel like asking someone for directions. That's when he'd felt someone tap on his shoulder. He had swiveled around and seen a small boy with spiky white hair and large teal eyes giving him a warm smile.

'Hi, I'm Toshiro. You must be new here,' he had exclaimed cheerily and had extended a hand. 'I can help you get around if you want. What say you?'

Grimmjow's blood had been pounding in his ears and his heart had been beating like a rapid animal locked in a cage. No one had ever made him feel this way before and he was lost for words on how to react to this boy who was mesmerizing him with his angelic voice and beautiful face. So he acted the only way he knew how to.

'I say fuck off, pipsqueak,' he had snapped at the boy. Toshiro pulled his hand away, hurt flitting across his face before being replaced by an angry look.

'If that's what you want, fine!' he has snapped, turning on his heel and had walked away. 'Don't expect me to help you ever again!'

And yet here he was, helping Grimmjow pass in biology. The irony. Then again, it's not like he had a choice. Grimmjow just stared at the back of that head of perfectly spiked mane. His hair looks so soft and lush he just wanted to reach out a hand and touch it. He wanted to grab it in his hand and yank the boy to him. To turn his face towards him and kiss those luscious lips of his…

'So where should we sit?' Toshiro queries, his hands laden with books. Grimmjow snaps out of his fantasy and looks around the library. No way did he want to sit in front where everyone can see him _study_. Seeing Grimmjow study was like seeing Haley's comet: rare. Plus, he didn't want his gang to come along and see him hanging out with Toshiro of all people. It had taken a while for him to build his image and he wasn't going to let that go down the drain. He didn't want them getting suspicious of him and his feelings for the little guy…

'Let's go sit at the back,' he states and navigates Toshiro to the far off end of the library. It was completely devoid of people. Good. He didn't want people around anyways. That way he can enjoy being around Toshiro without anyone finding out how he feels about him.

'Alright,' Toshiro begins as he slams on the books on the table and picks up one from the top. 'I told Professor Ukitake that we're covering the transport system of the body-!'

'What?'

'I'll put it simply: we're doing our project on blood. You know the icky red stuff that flows in our body?'

'I know what blood is,' Grimmjow snaps. 'What I mean is why do _you_ get to choose our topic?'

'We gotta go with the fact that who has the brains in this group,' Toshiro says coolly and smirks at him. He was going to enjoy insulting Grimmjow because no matter how much Grimmjow was going to want to punch him in the face, he'll have to bear with it if he wanted a high mark on this assignment.

Grimmjow gritted his teeth. Well, he can't blame Toshiro for hating him. After all, it was his fault that they got off on the wrong foot. Still, he wishes that if Toshiro let down his barriers just once, he'll see that Grimmjow can actually be a really nice guy. Well if Toshiro won't try, he will. Grimmjow sits down calmly and picks up a book.

'Let's get started,' he says dully. Toshiro just stares at him. He slams his hand down on the book in Grimmjow's hand and brings himself right in the blue-haired boy's face.

'What are you playing at?' he says suspiciously. Grimmjow gulps. He's never been this close to Toshiro before and he couldn't help but get lost in his deep, fathoming eyes of color. 'Grimmjow? Hello? I had just insulted you and you didn't react.'

'That's because we should work and not mess around,' Grimmjow says hastily and gets up to create distance between the two of them. Being so close to him almost drove him crazy because he knows he can't just reach out and kiss him. That would be so fucking _humiliating_.

Toshiro raises an eyebrow and walks around the table to come up to Grimmjow.

'You alright, Jaguerjack?' he asks curiously. Grimmjow's breathe grows shallow as Toshiro comes closer and closer.

'Stop jumping down my throat, Hitsugaya!' Grimmjow rasps as his back hits the bookshelves. He's thankful that no one is around to witness him looking like a wuss.

'Well, it's not every day you say you wanna study.' Toshiro glances at his watch. 'Well, thanks to your tardiness, we'll have to continue this some other day. We have till next week to complete this anyways. My place tomorrow. And _don't _be late.'

With that, Toshiro grabbed the books, his bag and left Grimmjow standing lost for words. Once Toshiro was out of sight, he began banging his head against the bookshelf.

'You fucking idiot!' he curses at himself. 'One more slip and he coulda found out! Now do you really want that?! Really?!'

Once he stopped hitting himself, he looks out the window of the library to watch Toshiro fumble with the books as he makes his way home. He groans and leans back on the bookshelf.

'Yes, yes I do,' he says bitterly.

* * *

'What an idiot,' Toshiro thinks as he enters his lane. Night is fast approaching as the chirps of birds are replaced by the chirps of crickets and the blue sky slowly changes to indigo with tinges of pink and yellow following the sun as it sets. Stars are also peeking out as the moon hovers over him. 'Him? Studying? Please! And I can dance!'

He turns around and walks backwards using his rear to push the gate to his house open.

'Hiya, Toshi!' sounds a robust voice. Toshiro turns around to grin at a busty woman waving at him from the garden neighboring his.

'Hi, Rangiku.'

'Soooo, how was school?'

'Can't complain. I got a biology project due next week. Made some progress with Grimmjow.'

'Grimmjow? Isn't he the guy who hates your guts?'

That's the one. On top of that, I have a secret admirer.'

'Ooooooo! Toshi! Since when did you become Mr. Irresistible?'

'Shut up, Rangiku. Is grandma asleep?'

'I don't think so. I just helped her cook dinner. Hope you like spaghetti!'

'Thanks, Rangiku. For everything since…'

'You don't have to mention it, Toshi. It's what neighbors are for.'

He smiles at her and makes to enter his home. Ever since his parents had passed away, Rangiku had been like an older sister to him. He couldn't take care of his house and his grandma while studying in school. So during the weekdays, Rangiku would watch his house while he attended school. He didn't mind sacrificing his weekends. His friends understood and never bothered him with going out to places though he would go with them sometimes when they nagged him till he went mad. Nothing could make him leave home that is, until Karin came along. He closes his eyes as he stops in his hall. He then turns to look at the calendar hanging on his left. His parents' death anniversary is coming up. Time really flies by.

'Toshiro? Is that you?' comes a delicate voice from the kitchen.

'Yes, grandma, it's me!'

'Well, come here, little one! I hope you like spaghetti!'

As soon as he was done eating, the phone rang.

'I'll get it!' Toshiro says and went to answer it. 'Hello? Hitsugaya residence.'

'Hi, Toshiro,' says a familiar voice and his body stiffens.

'What do you want, Karin?' he asks coldly.

'Just…just wanna ask how your day was,' she says hesitantly. 'You never gave me the chance to ask you that today.'

'Oh,' he says, slightly taken aback. 'Well, it was alright.' Pause. 'How was yours?'

'Horrible,' she groans. 'Kenpachi-san wouldn't leave me alone about the history of world war I. God! He can be a pain!'

Toshiro can't help cracking a smile. They laugh and joke for some time and soon, Toshiro has lost track of time. He's lost in the past of before summer. Before the heartbreak. When he and Karin were together…

'I never thought I'd miss you so much,' Karin finally says. Toshiro's body suddenly stiffens again as the memories of summer come flashing back to him.

'You should have thought of that before you did what you did,' he says icily.

'Toshi-!'

'Bye, Karin.' He slams the receiver down and pinches the bridge of his nose.

'Toshiro, who was that?'

'No one, grandma. I'm going to bed. Goodnight.'

Toshiro stares at the poem as he lies down on his bed.

_**Why do we do this?**_

He sighs and places the poem on his bedside table before rolling over to stare at the full moon. He can feel tears starting to fill his eyes.

_**Can I help it,**_

_**If I feel this way?**_

He buries his face in his pillow and cries himself to sleep.

_**Can I help it,**_

_**That it hurts?**_


	6. Accepting Fate

_**The train rushes by, **_

_**Like Mr. Rabbit from Alice and Wonderland.**_

_**I like the sound it makes.**_

_**In the ill-lit maze of underground,**_

_**People shuffle.**_

_**Chrome yellow twin specks,**_

_**Visible in the endless black,**_

_**Only to belong to a metal tube,**_

_**Like a ferry into the abyss.**_

_**It's not mine, you go on.**_

_**No,no, it's ok. I'm waiting for someone anyway.**_

_**He's coming. Don't worry. He said he would.**_

_**My sneaker's screeching echo down under.**_

_**My phone is giving me the silent treatment.**_

_**He said he was coming.**_

_**He said he would.**_

_**The train rushes by.**_

_**I like the sound it makes.**_

'Wow,' Toshiro whispers as he goes over the poem once again. Whoever his secret admirer was, he could seriously write. And he was in pain. He'd been waiting for Toshiro for some reason. But for what? Toshiro really wants to know. But then, does that mean he really wants to know who this person is? He hasn't told anyone about his secret poet except Rangiku. Izuru and Hinamori were in the dark. Hinamori only knew about the first poem but he just couldn't bring himself to tell her about the others. He would never hesitate in telling her things but this is different. He wasn't ready to tell them about someone having a crush on him. Besides that, he didn't think he himself was ready to open his heart to loving someone again.

He looks up at the door marked 'G. Ichimaru'. If he isn't ready to embrace love, then why the hell does he palpitate when he's around Gin? He's his teacher for God's sake! Still, there's something about him that sets Toshiro over the edge. Is it his smile, his hair or his irresistible bad boy attitude? Even though he's a teacher, Gin indulges in smoking in between classes, he drives a freaking red hot convertible and he makes wearing a suit look sexy. Girls swoon over him as much as they do over Prince Ichigo.

Toshiro chuckles to himself. Prince Ichigo has some competition. Speaking of the devil, he hadn't seen him since yesterday's lunch. Either he's avoiding him or Toshiro is and to be honest, the latter is the truer one. He now knows that the sexiest boy in school is gay and has the hots for him of all people. Toshiro didn't know whether to be flattered or disgusted. He knew for one thing and that's he's damn confused. He'd spent all his time hating Ichigo but upon realizing that he has feelings for the icy boy, all hate seems to melt away. So it's true. Love does change people. But it's probably not even love. Ichigo is not exactly known for his commitments. He's probably infatuated with Toshiro for the time being. He will eventually move on.

And what about Toshiro? He closes his eyes and opens them again to gaze at the name on the door longingly. Well, he'll just have to see what fate has in store for his life of romance.

'You can come in, Toshiro-kun, I won't bite,' comes Gin's cool voice from inside. Shaken out of his thoughts, Toshiro turns the doorknob and enters the somewhat tiny office. There's a large desk at which Gin is sitting behind and marking papers. In front of the desk is a small table and chair from one of the classrooms. Toshiro takes his place there and faces Gin patiently as he continues checking papers.

'Here.' Gin hands him a stack of papers. 'Work on these until I finish with these assignments. These are of college level mathematics. Knock yourself out.'

Toshiro adores maths. It's one subject he can get lost in without a care in the world. No words. No confusions. Just plain, simple numbers and equations begging to be solved. And best of all, he's so wrapped up in it that he won't notice Gin and hyperventilate due to the close proximity.

Time crawled by this way and Toshiro is at peace with his raging emotions. They didn't once drive me crazy or force him to observe this fine specimen of a man in front of him. He had just finished the last question when he feels a soft breeze blow at the back of his neck. He jumps, his heart back to racing like it has to win a marathon. Gin leans in closer behind him, his hair brushing against his shoulder and causing goose bumps to rise over there. The man grabs his hand holding a pencil and directs it to a sum.

'You missed a step here,' he says softly and uses Toshiro's hand to fix the problem. Toshiro swallows and tries to regulate his breathing so that it would seem normal. Gin finally releases his hand and takes his paper into his own hands. As he moves to the front, he goes over Toshiro's answers. He looks up and flashes him a smile. Toshiro feels like he's going to start swooning like a love struck girl any minute now.

'Brilliant, Toshiro-kun,' he praises. 'They were not joking when they called you a genius. I must ask, why are you here when you can be in MIT or Harvard?'

'I-I chose not to leave,' Toshiro mumbles, daring not to look up at his teacher.

'But surely a person as intelligent as you and brimming with potential can't possibly expect yourself to excel in a small town like Karakura? No offense to the town.'

'I-I can't imagine life beyond it, Ichimaru-san.' Toshiro looks out the window at the browning leaves of the oak trees outside which indicate the coming of autumn. 'I've grown up here and experienced all there is to know while living in this little town. I've been gained so much while living here and also lost so much…'

His voice trailed off as he gets lost in his thoughts. Gin looks at the boy with interest.

'Toshiro-kun,' he says softly and smiles at the boy when he looks at him. Toshiro can't help blushing and scolds himself inwardly. This smile of Gin is different from his usual arrogant ones. This one spoke of compassion. Great. Just what he needed. Another reason to fall for him even harder.

'If there is anything you want to talk about,' he says softly, sending a chill up Toshiro's spine. 'I'm here if you need me. Just come to my office anytime you want to. I'll be here.'

Then, out of the blue, he reaches out a hand and pats his cheek, his hand lingering there a bit too long. Stunned, Toshiro doesn't know whether to pull away or nuzzle his face into that soft hand. Fighting the urge, he quickly grabs his bag and stands up abruptly, startling Gin with his sudden movement. His teacher gives him a curious look. Damn, Gin looks so sexy in his suit! It's charcoal grey with a silk lilac shirt inside. School's out so his tie is loosely hung around his neck and his hair is slightly disheveled, giving him a 'just-got-out-of-bed' look. Toshiro averts his eyes to the ground in case Gin notices that he's drooling.

'Are we done for today, Ichimaru-san?' he says a little loudly, looking like he's conversing with the ground. He then feels a hand grab his chin and pull his face up to look at Gin's.

'Are you sure you're alright, Toshiro-kun?' Gin asks with concern.

But Toshiro is lost for words. He wrenches himself from the man's grasp and bangs into the door behind him. He's glad that the office is so small for at least he can escape quickly and easily.

'I'll-I'll see you in the next lesson, Ichimaru-san!' Toshiro calls as he races out of the room. He can't tell whether his heart is beating faster or his feet as they made contact with the floor as he zoomed down the hall. Soon, they were beating as one in harmony and once he was outside, he stopped short of the bus stop to catch his breath. He's been running a lot this year he might as well try out for the track team!

He looks back at the school building just looming there in front of him, as if mocking him for his humiliating behavior in front of Gin. He sighs and looks at the treetops of the park in front of him. Children are playing with the leaves spiraling down from the multi-colored trees while couples cuddled on the benches and exchanged kisses. He leans against the bus stop sign and looks straight ahead, trying to ignore everything around him and trying to concentrate on his muddled thoughts.

He now knows, no doubt about it, that he has very, _very _strong feelings for his mathematics teacher, Gin Ichimaru, and try as he might to try to suppress those feelings, they will not go away. He's on the road to falling head over heels in love with him.


	7. Bring It On

'So the poor bastard made a big mistake by looking at me straight in the eye and I just hate it when people stare at me,' Grimmjow drawls away as he downs his can of Coke and crushes it in his hand. 'So you know what I did?'

'Hm?' Toshiro says as he scribbles something into his notebook, sitting cross-legged on his bed.

'I dumped the sucker in the trashcan,' the blue-haired bully says triumphantly as he leans back to rest his head on Toshiro's bed's headboard and laughs loudly. 'Worst of, it was the one near the cafeteria. The one where people throw up in when they serve us the expired stuff. Which was that very day. Classic, wouldn't you say?'

'Yea, great,' Toshiro mutters as he continues concentrating on his notebook. Grimmjow looks at him grumpily and crosses his arms across his chest.

'You know, pipsqueak, for a smartass you're pretty dead,' he remarks, hoping that would get some reaction out of the silent boy. It did.

'Watch what you're calling me, jackass,' he growls and glares at Grimmjow. He's applying so much pressure to the pencil in his hand it looks like it's going to break. Grimmjow grins in satisfaction. 'You wouldn't wanna fail now, would you?'

'Neither would you,' Grimmjow points out. 'I don't give a damn if I fail but you can't stand getting a bad grade. It's your loss not mine. Seriously, you suck at blackmail.'

'Don't pull that one on me,' Toshiro says coolly as he goes back to sketching something in his notebook. 'You got a pretty bad record so a good score might actually help you stay here. Do you think I was born yesterday?'

'Probably,' Grimmjow smirks and watches how a nerve starts throbbing on the side of Toshiro's temple but he continues to make notes. 'What are you writing anyways? You haven't even looked at any of the books yet.'

As he makes to reach for the notebook in Toshiro's hand, the boy snatches it out of his reach. Grimmjow raises an eyebrow at him.

'My writing is hard to read and I don't think your brain would be able to comprehend it,' Toshiro says icily. Grimmjow scowls.

'You know, I ain't as stupid as you think I am,' he snaps.

'You have yet to prove that,' Toshiro snaps back. He places the book in his lap and scoots away from his enemy. If Grimmjow had been any faster, he would have seen that Toshiro had been scrawling Gin's name all over the page with hearts and even dotting the 'i''s with little hearts and cupid arrows. Ever since he finally came to terms with his feelings for Gin, he's been thinking about him nonstop. On his way home, he thought he saw Gin at least 7 times. When his eyes are open, he's there. When he closes his eyes, he's still there. This time his feelings aren't drive him crazy because at least he's admitting that he has a crush on the handsome teacher. But he now has to deal with seeing him every day and not say a word about his adoration for the man. Because one, he's his teacher. Two, he's his teacher. And three, he's his FREAKING TEACHER! Toshiro groans inwardly. Why did he get into this mess?

'Yo! Toshiro! Anybody in there?' Grimmjow says and knocks on the side of Toshiro's head.

'Hey! Don't touch me!' Toshiro protests and as he tries to escape Grimmjow, he topples off his bed and lands on his elbows. He cries out in pain and lies there for a minute to let the pain ease down. Grimmjow peeks down from the edge of the bed at Toshiro and grins broadly.

'Smooth, pipsqueak,' he teases.

'Don't call me that!' Toshiro fumes and shoots up to glare at him. Grimmjow just laughs in his face. Toshiro tries to keep the angry look on his face but then he too bursts out laughing. He can't help forgetting that he's supposed to hate this guy and ends up enjoying hanging around with him. If you got beyond all that muscle and toughness, Grimmjow is nothing but an easy-going, fun-loving guy. and not many people could make him laugh.

Grimmjow's grin widens as he watches Toshiro laugh. Toshiro is finally warming up to him and to be honest, it actually makes him feel light and ecstatic. It isn't exactly the same as he feels about the little guy but it's a start. Maybe, just maybe, he might end up developing feelings for the bully as well…

The sound of a doorbell interrupts their laughing fit and distracts them from their fun. Confused, Toshiro looks out his window and groans. He flattens himself against the wall next to the window and gives Grimmjow an irritated look.

'Ichigo,' he whispers and Grimmjow's stomach clenches. He too looks out and sees the orange-headed prince looking around Toshiro's yard while twirling a long-stemmed red rose in his hand. He grits his teeth in frustration. What was that idiot doing here at _his _Toshiro's house?

'What does _he _want?' Grimmjow hisses under his breath.

'I don't think I want to know,' Toshiro murmurs but he looks out the window again anyways. 'Kurasaki!'

Ichigo looks up, grins and waves the rose at him.

'Hey, Toshiro!' he calls. 'Come on down! I got a surprise for you!'

'Ichigo, I've got work to do. Whatever it is, it's better you do it next time, alright?'

'Toshirooo!' He pouts. 'This is the annual Karakura Food Festival and it's not like it'll be here tomorrow! Today's the last day and I wanna take you there!'

'You mean like a date?' Grimmjow calls out and appears in the window next to Toshiro. Ichigo's smile disappears and turns into a scowl.

'What's _he_ doing there?' he demands coldly.

'Like he said, we're doing work, carrot top,' Grimmjow says nonchalantly. 'So go and enjoy stuffing your face alone. Later.'

'I'm not going anywhere, blue boy,' Ichigo says dangerously and gives Grimmjow a piercing stare. Grimmjow's hands curl into fists. Toshiro gives him an uneasy look. He was moving into the danger mode where if he didn't control himself, he would go down and ripp Ichigo apart and Ichigo didn't have his usual posse to save him this time. Toshiro himself wasn't strong enough to fend Grimmjow off so it looks like there's only one thing left to do to please everyone.

'Hang on, Kurasaki, I'm coming down,' Toshiro calls. 'Just let me go get my jacket.'

Ichigo flashes Grimmjow a triumphant smile as Toshiro leaves the window to go downstairs. Grimmjow stares at him angrily before turning on Toshiro.

'What the hell, pipsqueak?' he snarls and grabs his arm rather forcefully. He lets go when he realizes how unusually he must be acting.

'Look, Grimmjow,' Toshiro explains. 'Ichigo isn't going leave till I say yes and if he stays, I don't think you'll be able to stop yourself from punching his face in. So it's best I get him away from you and this is the only way. We'll continue at your place next time, alright?'

Grimmjow wants to argue but he knows Toshiro is right so he closes his mouth and lets Toshiro leave the room. Glancing back at the window one last time, he storms down to meet Ichigo. They should have one-on-one chitchat before he whisked Toshiro off on a 'romantic date'.

'Listen pal,' he snarls in Ichigo's face who just gives him a demure smile. 'Don't pull any fast moves on Toshiro or I'll-!'

'Or you'll what? Hurt me? My, my, aren't we overprotective,' Ichigo says smoothly and places a hand on his peaches and cream colored cheek tinged rosy due to the nipping breeze of approaching autumn. 'Wait a minute; this isn't about protecting the little heartthrob, is it?' His grin widens. 'Does the school bully have a little _crush_ on Toshiro Hitsugaya?'

Grimmjow hisses and glances at the house as if expecting Toshiro to be listening in on their conversation. He turns back to the smirking prince. Damn Ichigo for being so perceptive and damn himself for being so vulnerable as to give himself away! He's been hiding it so well all this time and Ichigo, who barely even looks at him, guesses his deepest, darkest secret within a few seconds just by judging his tone of voice. Fuck! He's screwed if Ichigo plans on telling Toshiro…

'Relax, blue boy,' Ichigo says simply. 'I'm not going to tell him. Like as if I care how you feel about him. In case you haven't guessed by now, I'm interested in him as well but unlike you, I'm not scared to admit it and make a move.' He grins at the house. 'Better watch it, Jaguerjack. You'll never know who'll claim your prize before you do.'

'As if Toshiro would be interested in a guy like you,' Grimmjow scoffs and now it's his turn to smirk.

'What? And like you know what kind of guy he's interested in?' Ichigo says in a mocking tone, hands on his hips.

'Yea, I believe I do,' Grimmjow says confidently. 'He likes the bad boys. Ones who got _personality_.'

'So that doesn't include you?' Ichigo say innocently.

'Keep mocking me, little prince, but I _will _get Toshiro in the end.'

'Is that a _challenge_, Jaguerjack?'

'You scared, carrot top?'

'Bring it on, bastard.'

'Winner gets to keep Toshiro and the other has to back off.'

'Deal.'

'What's going on here?' Toshiro says suspiciously as he sees the two of them shaking hands.

'Just, coming to an understanding that's all,' Ichigo says dreamily and grins at Grimmjow.

'So none of your business, pipsqueak,' Grimmjow snaps, regaining his former self's attitude. Toshiro gives him a haughty glance before walking past him towards the gate.

'Let's go and get this over with, Kurasaki,' he says emotionlessly. Ichigo winks at Grimmjow and follows Toshiro out. He hands the boy the rose and then drapes his hand lightly on Toshiro's shoulder, who jumps slightly but then relaxes. Ichigo turns around and salutes Grimmjow as they round the corner and disappear. Grimmjow grits his teeth and makes towards his own home. The war has begun and looks like Ichigo has the upper hand. Well, if there's one thing Grimmjow can't stand and that's losing and there's no way he's going to lose the love of his life to some prick like Ichigo Kurasaki.


	8. Watermelons and Fireworks

Toshiro observes the Thai dance going on before him and tries to avoid being hit by their hand movements. He has to admit, it's interesting but he could be spending his evening doing something more constructive than watching a pair of women contort themselves in angles that look like they are painful. He feels an elbow at his side and looks up to see a grinning Ichigo as he looks at the dance going on before the awed crowd.

'Looks cool, doesn't it?' he says and hands Toshiro a cup of shaved ice soaked in a pink liquid. Toshiro takes a bite and feels his taste buds tingle while his insides freeze. He cannot understand why he's having ice while it's as cold as a refrigerator outside but the watermelon flavor makes up for it. He takes another bite and shivers as this time, the cold rushes to his head and numbs it. He adores watermelons but it doesn't help ease the iciness of the treat. He sways slightly and Ichigo grabs him.

'Brain-freeze, huh?' he teases and uprights him but holds on a bit too long. Toshiro snatches his arm away and watches the remainder of the dance until the women bow down to the clapping and usher the people to the Thai food stall.

It's growing dark now. Strings of lights are turned on and glow above the stalls like little fairies. Children laugh and weave through the crowd as they play with their miniature windmills on a stick. Couples walk by with their arms around each other, nuzzling noses and kissing. Toshiro clears his throat and looks down at his cup whenever a couple passes by. Ichigo looks at him curiously.

'Hey, Tosh?' he says as he stuffs his hands in his jacket, looking straight ahead.

'Don't call me that!' Toshiro says suddenly and angrily.

'Why not? You got something against me?'

'Well in case you don't know, we're not exactly the best of friends.'

'Good. I don't think I'd like of you to see me as just a friend.'

Toshiro can feel his face grow hot. He grips his cup tighter.

'Kurasaki, I know you're gay. But I'm not. So don't think I'll change for you. I'm flattered you're interested in me. But I can't return your affections.'

'Tch, I wish you wouldn't call me 'Kurasaki'. Shows the distance between us.'

Toshiro scowls at him but Ichigo just grins and doesn't look at him, his scarf fluttering behind him.

'Did you even hear what I just said? I'm not _interested_!'

'I heard you. But that's what they all say in the beginning. Trust me, Toshiro, you'll come through.'

Ichigo breathes out, creating a puff of icy breath to escape his lips. Toshiro raises an eyebrow at him before taking a bite of his sweet treat and shuddering again due to the cold. He doesn't care how cold it is; he enjoys the taste of watermelon rolling on his tongue. Plus, it reminded him of…

'So what's with you and Karin?' Ichigo asks out of the blue. Toshiro almost trips on his own feet.

'Who told you?' he blurts out.

'A little birdie.' Ichigo grins widely. Toshiro growls.

'Momo…' he hisses under his breath. He looks back at Ichigo and assumes a calm face. 'We went out once. But she turned out to be a bitch. So we broke up.'

Ichigo whistles.

'Harsh,' he exclaims.

'The truth usually is.'

'What did she do?'

'None of your business.'

'That bad?'

'You have no idea.' Toshiro clamps a hand over his mouth. Ichigo laughs.

'Chill out, Toshiro! I won't push you to tell me everything. It's not easy finding out the people you love can break your heart.' He looks up at the starry sky. 'I should know. I first opened up about my sexuality to my best friend. I was head over heels in love with him and I thought he would understand. I was so stupid to think that.' He looks down at Toshiro who is, surprisingly, listening. Ichigo gives him a sad smile and his eyes seem to be showing Toshiro the heartbreak their owner had suffered at the time of the incident. 'We haven't spoken to each other for three years since then. Byakuya prefers to stay away from me now though I don't think he's told his sister I'm gay. And I guess he doesn't plan to. He really is ashamed of what I am and of the fact we were friends once.'

He says the last part quite bitterly, taking Toshiro by surprise. He never knew that the prince was ever rejected by anyone let alone a sensitive soul. He always saw him as this perfect egotistical guy who couldn't get enough of himself. Turns out, there's more to this boy than just a pretty face and a popular image.

'Why are you telling me this, Kurasaki?' Toshiro says quietly after a moment of silence as they walk.

'I trust you, Toshiro,' Ichigo says simply. 'You're not like the other guys I've dated. You seem honest and down to earth. It's what I like about you.'

'I'm still not going to go out with you, Kurasaki.'

'Oh yeah? Then what are we doing right now, Toshiro?' He laughs and gives him a playful nudge. 'Relax! I'm not going to pull anything on you. I wanna take it slow with you. You deserve the special treatment from me.' He winks at him. 'And call me Ichigo.'

Toshiro rolls his eyes and turns to admire the beautifully adorned stall on his side, not wanting Ichigo to see the smile playing on his lips. Ichigo isn't as bad as he thought he was. Toshiro actually feels ashamed for thinking he was just an arrogant brat. He's can't believe he's getting to know the people he's hated since last year and is actually liking them. Still, he only wants to be friends with Ichigo, nothing more and nothing less. Suddenly, Ichigo stops abruptly and sticks out his hand to stop Toshiro.

'What is it, Ichigo?' Toshiro says irritably. The prince points to the sky and smiles softly.

'It's time for the fireworks,' he whispers. As if on cue, the sky lights with showers of blues, greens, yellows and all the colors of the rainbow. Toshiro watches in awe as the fireworks form a dragon that dances across the midnight blue sky before disappearing in spirals of flickering colors. Flares streak across the sky and bathe the festival in its brilliant light. Toshiro is so mesmerized by the display that he doesn't notice Ichigo put his arm around him and cuddle up to him. To everyone else, they looked like any other couple. But Toshiro doesn't care. Right now, he just wants to enjoy the fireworks without having to worry about anything…

* * *

'Shut up, Ichigo!'

'I'm sorry! But you should've seen your face when you ate that Mexican chili!'

'I'd like to see you try it and not want to dunk your head in a bucket of ice! I was fucking burning up and all you did was laugh your ass off!'

Ichigo wipes a tear from his eye and pats Toshiro's head as they stroll down the sidewalk and turn the corner to reach his house. Toshiro huffs and crosses his arms.

'C'mon, Toshiro! Don't be a spoilsport! I'm just having fun with you!' Ichigo protests when Toshiro refuses to talk or even look at him. Toshiro smiles a little and upon seeing him smirking like that, Ichigo shoves him playfully.

'No fair! You're just teasing me!' Ichigo whines. Toshiro chuckles as he leans on his gate to push it open.

'Don't be a spoilsport, Ichigo! I'm just having fun with you,' he says slyly. He skips down his footpath to his house. Ichigo follows, laughing as well now. Toshiro pulls out his house keys and fits it into the lock.

'Well, this is goodbye,' he says, smiling now. 'I hate to admit, Ichigo, but I had a nice time. Helped relieve me of some stress.'

'No problem, Toshiro,' Ichigo says softly. Noting the change in his tone, Toshiro quickly looks up and locks eyes with the prince. His gorgeous chocolate brown eyes are soft and gentle and seem to be yearning for him. Before he can process what might be forming in the prince's mind, Toshiro notices that Ichigo is leaning in really close, his lips just inches from his.

'Don't,' Toshiro mutters. Ichigo stops.

'Why not, Toshiro?' he whispers. Toshiro takes a step back and fixes Ichigo with a serious look.

'I'm not ready to be open for another relationship, Ichigo,' he says severely. 'I don't think…I'll be ready for a very long time. I-I'm sorry.'

Ichigo looks down at his feet.

'Yea, alright,' he mutters and then he hears a door shut. He looks up and sees Toshiro has disappeared. Breathing a sigh of disappointment, he shuffles off the porch and walks away, his shoulders drooping in sadness. Toshiro peeks out the window to see him leave. He sighs and walks up to his room to sleep. He may not feel for Ichigo as he feels for him, but he just couldn't help feeling sorry for the prince. Still, he didn't want to give him hope that Toshiro might go out with him. Not when his heart belongs to someone else.


	9. See Me

Izuru goes over the pieces of paper, mouthing the words and scrunching up his eyebrows as he read. Once he's done, he shuffles them together and hands them back to Toshiro.

'Well? What do you think?' Toshiro asks. Izuru shakes his head.

'I don't recognize the handwriting,' he says gently. 'But it's definitely someone who has strong feelings for you. You can sense it in the poems and their meanings.'

'That's not all. Here's the latest one.' He hands Izuru another scrap of paper.

_**Do you see me?**_

_**Do you see me at all?**_

_**I stand next to you,**_

_**But you turn the other way.**_

_**I stand behind you,**_

_**But you leave without a say.**_

_**I stand in front of you,**_

_**But you look right through me.**_

_**Far, far away…**_

_**Do you see me?**_

_**I don't think so…**_

_**Prove me wrong.**_

_**I beg of you.**_

_**Because I see you,**_

_**And it hurts.**_

Izuru sighs, folds up the paper and hands it back.

'Well, that just proves it. Someone is in love with you.'

Toshiro rolls his eyes. Izuru gives an exasperated sigh.

'Toshiro, are you really that dense!' he cries out and grabs one of the scraps of paper from Toshiro. He points to a line. 'This whole poem about eating the forbidden fruit! It's like this person is trying to say that they want to be with you but something is stopping them from confessing. Like it's a sin.'

'Thank you, Mr. Sentimental. Well, why can't they tell me?' Toshiro presses.

'I don't know,' Izuru says, biting his lower lip. 'Scared? Shy?'

'It's not that hard to approach me and tell the truth!' Toshiro says angrily and stuffs the poems into a folder. Izuru stares at him.

'In case no one has told you this before, Toshiro,' he starts. 'You've got a pretty short temper and that scares people.'

'It didn't scare you from being my friend,' Toshiro points out.

'Yea, well, you did. In the beginning,' Izuru admits. 'But then I got to know you as a person when you helped me settle into Karakura Junior School. People need to warm up to you before they make up their mind about what kinda guy you are. Your secret admirer has probably liked you from afar and just doesn't have the guts to admit it yet. Give them time. They'll come around.'

Toshiro sighs and knows that Izuru is right. He's hard to get along with because of his icy attitude and hot temper. He's erratic and only his friends knew him well enough to appreciate him. He's usually nice to newbies. He kinda feels sorry for them because they are all alone in a strange place. He knows what it's like to be singled out and to have no one. After all, he's been an orphan for so long he's forgotten what it's like to have parents.

'Hey, Toshiro, I know this is out of the blue,' Izuru says suddenly, interrupting his thoughts. 'But you got a clue on who it can be? Like, even a small hint?'

Toshiro delves back into his thoughts.

'Well,' he says carefully. 'This is kinda embarrassing but I get a feeling it's not a girl.' He blushes slightly. 'I mean, you can say the best candidate for poetry skills is a girl but the style is too sloppy. Girls don't have messy handwriting. It's definitely a guy.'

'So you got a guy lover on your back,' Izuru grins and wacks his bag into Toshiro. 'Well, that narrows it down.'

He looks to his left and Ichigo is leaning against a wall, surrounded by a gaggle of girls and a few guys from his gang. He looks in their direction and upon seeing Toshiro; he smiles slightly and raises his hand in a small wave. Toshiro raises his hand to wave but on second thought, he lowers it and hurries away. Izuru catches up to him.

'Rukia has been babbling that she saw you two together yesterday at the Food Festival,' Izuru exclaims. 'Did something happen?'

'We didn't kiss,' Toshiro snaps. Izuru looks at him in surprise. Toshiro sighs.

'Sorry,' he apologizes. 'I'm kinda in a mess right now. The poems, the assignment, extra classes with Gin (his heart skips a beat) and now Ichigo. And, then there's tomorrow…'

'Oh.' Izuru ponders over something for a minute. 'Want me and Hinamori to come over tomorrow?'

'Nah, it's alright. I'll just do my usual routine. Attend half of school and then go home to mourn with my grandma. Or I might just skip school altogether. Don't worry about me, Izuru. I'll be fine. I'm used to celebrating my parent's death anniversary by myself.'

They walk in silence and slip out the school entrance doors. It's near noon now and school is out.

'Got any extra classes today?' Izuru asks, breaking the silence.

'Nope,' he says, trying not to sound too disappointment. 'I'm heading to Grimmjow's for our project. I think we're finally going to wrap it up.'

'How's it going with the bonehead?'

'He's…not as big as a pain as I thought he was. He's actually a pretty decent guy.'

'You make it sound like you're checking him out.' Izuru ducks as Toshiro launches his bag at his face.

'Now don't you go and say _he's _the one sending me poems, Izuru!'

'Now why would I do that when you got the prince hankering after you?' Izuru teases and receives a glare from Toshiro. 'Stop being so uptight, Toshiro. You need to loosen up once in a while.'

* * *

'Jeez, Toshiro, stop being so uptight. You need to loosen up once in a while!' Grimmjow exclaims as he re-enters his room with two cans of beer. Toshiro glowers at him as he leans back in Grimmjow's swivel chair.

'Shut up. I already got that from someone today and don't need to you to remind me,' he growls and buries his face in a book. 'And I don't drink beer.'

Grimmjow pulls Toshiro's book out of his hand and scans the page he was reading. Making a face, he drops the book on his bed and tosses the can to Toshiro, who catches it.

'You know whoever told you you're uptight has a reason for saying it,' Grimmjow utters as he takes a gulp of his drink. Toshiro places his can on the floor and crosses his arms.

'That person knows me,' he says sullenly. 'You, on the other hand, take pleasure in bullying me. Now who should I listen to?'

'It's not like we're strangers to each other now,' Grimmjow states as he crosses the room and settles on his bed. 'Or have you forgotten the purpose of this project other than looking up facts on blood which, by the way, is gross.'

'You'd rather we do it on reproduction?' Toshiro says mockingly.

'We could do it on sex and you chose the human transport system? You're sadder than I thought, pipsqueak!'

Grimmjow grabs the can that comes sailing towards him. Grinning at Toshiro, he opens it and takes a few sips. More for him. This is the best day of his life! He's chilling in his house, drinking two cans of beer and best of all, Toshiro is over and he has him all to himself. No Prince Ichigo here to ruin his moment with Toshiro. He'll show him who Toshiro is really into.

'So, pip-I mean, Toshiro,' he says casually. 'Seeing anyone lately?'

Toshiro has repossessed his book and is pouring over it again.

'Not that I'm aware of,' Toshiro says sarcastically. He then realizes what Grimmjow has just asked him. 'Why do you ask?'

'What? Can't a guy ask a guy whether he's going out?'

'Not unless he wants to know something of interest to him.'

'Shit!' Grimmjow thinks but tries to remain calm. He doesn't want Toshiro to find so soon that he's been crushing on him! He doesn't want to scare the little guy away before he can make a move.

'Sure, I'm so interested in your personal life, Toshiro,' Grimmjow says and rolls his eyes.

'You called me Toshiro.'

'Would you get off my back now? What are you? The FBI?' Grimmjow snarls and sits him in his bed to glare at Toshiro who is just looking at him calmly. Upon his reaction, Toshiro smiles and returns to his book.

'Well, at least I know you're still Grimmjow,' he says casually. Fuming, Grimmjow lies back in his bed. Toshiro may be the love of his life but he sure as hell could be a major piss-off at times. Maybe that's why he's so attracted to him.

'You seeing someone, Grimmjow?' Toshiro asks. Caught off guard, Grimmjow glances quickly at Toshiro, who's still leafing through the book.

'What's it to you?' Grimmjow asks, his eyes narrowing. Toshiro puts his book down.

'Well, if you can ask me I don't see why I can't ask you,' he says, a slow smile spreading across his face. Grimmjow still eyes him suspiciously. What is he playing at?

'I'm single and proud of it,' he says hotly, flushing slightly. He's just glad Toshiro can't see his scarlet face.

'But do you like anybody in particular?' Silence. 'So who is it?'

'Hey! Just 'cuz I don't answer doesn't mean there is someone!'

'Well, I don't see what else it can mean!'

'I don't wanna talk about it, Toshiro…'

'Is it Harribel?'

'Toshiro…'

'Please don't tell me it's Rukia. She's a pain in the ass.'

'I mean it, Toshiro…'

'Wait, wait. Is it Soifon? I mean, she is your kind of girl; hot-headed, tough…'

'You're really pushing it now…'

'Wait. She's taken. Well, what about-!'

'SHUT THE FUCK UP GOD DAMN IT!'

Grimmjow is now standing up, his hands balled into fists at his sides and his face red with rage.

'Shut the fuck up,' he repeats through gritted teeth. 'Nobody died and made you cupid so stop acting like you are! I don't like anyone, I never will and I don't need you of all people telling me who to like! I can decide that for myself so fucking BACK OFF!'

Toshiro is frozen for a second. Once Grimmjow is done, he springs to his feet, grabs his books and approaches Grimmjow.

_SMACK!_

Grimmjow looks at the feisty little guy in horror, his cheek stinging. Did he just punch him? Toshiro gives him a furious glare.

'I'm not trying to be a pest, Grimmjow,' he snaps. 'I'm trying to be a friend, which you seem to lack the ability to be. But just like the first time we met, you're still a jackass and that will never change. You know what? I'll finish our assignment myself. Take all the credit if you want. I just don't want to see your face ever again.'

With that, he stomps away from him and bangs the door as he leaves. Once realization sinks in of what just happened, Grimmjow groans and topples onto his bed. He pounds his pillow in frustration and lets out an animal cry. He just blew his chances with Toshiro. So much for the best day of his life…


	10. Please Be Happy

'It's funny,' Toshiro thinks glumly as he shifts in his bed to look out the window. 'That ten years ago, I woke up this very day to find out my parents never came home from the movies last night. That someone was going to find their bodies in a lonely alleyway.'

The sun is just rising on a new day. The sky is streaked in soft pastel shades and the birds flying across the canvas are like ink strokes. The neighborhood is still fast asleep for after all, it is seven in the morning. Silence and tranquility has the place under its spell. Toshiro has to admit, nothing could be more beautiful or perfect about the start of this day save the fact, it is his parent's death anniversary.

His grandma never wakes him up for school nor does he use an alarm. He likes getting up early himself and then lies in bed to brood over stuff. And right now, he's thinking of whether he should go to school or not. Well he does have an extra class with Gin today. That's something to look forward to. But then, he'd had to get through the rest of school. Does he really have the energy let alone the strength to smile and act like everything is all right with him today? Maybe going to school isn't such a good idea…

'SHIROOO-CHAANNNN!' comes a loud and shrill voice just below his window that makes him jump at least ten feet in the air. He scrambles across his bed to lean out the window. He has his bed positioned right next to it since he likes to think while lying in his bed and staring out at the world. But at the moment, this isn't exactly relaxing.

'Momo! Izuru! What are you guys doing here?' he cries out in astonishment. He'd usually meet them at the corner at 7.30 to walk to school. They are both dressed and Momo is looking as fresh as ever while Izuru looks like Momo had dragged him out of bed. He stifles a yawn as Momo grabs a pebble and throws it at Toshiro who ducks.

'What are you? Insane?' he shrieks.

'Get out of bed this minute and get ready for school!' she shouts at him.

'Sssh! Not so loud! You'll wake everyone up!' Toshiro hisses. 'Izuru! Didn't you tell her I might not go to school!'

'Not my fault she wouldn't listen to me, Toshiro!' Izuru says sleepily. 'You're lucky. She woke me up with a bucket of cold water!'

'Which you'll get too if you don't hurry up!' Momo taunts hands on her hips and her foot tapping away impatiently on the footpath.

'Alright, alright, I'm coming down! Keep your skirt on! Jeez!' Toshiro mutters as he retreats from his window. Next thing he knows he's walking down the sidewalk and entering school ground.

'I really don't want to be here, Momo,' he murmurs angrily as he hoists his bag up his shoulder.

'Don't be stupid, Shiro-chan!' Momo exclaims confidently and pats his head. 'You need to be here, especially today. Toshiro…' she locks eyes with him and he sees the sympathy in them. 'You can't spend the rest of your life in the shadow of your past. Just like you got over Karin, (his eyes suddenly go cold) you need to get over your parent's death.'

'Easy for you to say, Hinamori,' he spits at her and shifts out of her reach. 'This day has more bad memories than you can ever imagine…'

'I know, Shiro-chan,' she says softly and she looks at Izuru, who is feeling uncomfortable with the situation. It's not the first time they talked about what happened this very day a year ago; how Toshiro had changed completely. 'But you can't run away from it forever. It's now or never or you'll be like this for the rest of your life. You just gotta trust us on this, 'kay? We'll be by your side through thick and thin.'

'I know, Momo,' he sighs and tries to smile. 'I can always count on you guys for support-!'

'Hinamori! Is that you? I thought some new fat kid had joined school!' Rukia taunts as she strolls past them. Hinamori starts seeing red.

'Come back here, Rukia Kuchiki, and I'll show you what this 'fat kid' can do to damage your 'fat head'!' she snarls and runs off after her.

'Izuru-kuunnn! Where are you?' Shunsui-san sings as he looks around in the hallway for his favorite pupil. Izuru turns paler than he usually is.

'Oh no! He probably wants to know if I've finished my assignment so he can spend the entire period praising it!' he groans and sprints off down the corridor.

'I take back what I said about you guys,' he mutters and saunters off to his locker. He looks around at the people joking and chatting away. They all seem so happy and content with their lives. And why shouldn't they be? They haven't lost anything important to them. They haven't been hurt so badly that they want to cry. They are perfectly normal souls going about their perfectly normal lives on a perfectly normal day. Toshiro snorts. Did Momo really expect him to think today can be just like any other day? As he slowly approached his locker he can't help but groan inwardly as a orange-haired boy can be seen leaning against _his _locker as if waiting for him to arrive. Upon seeing him, Ichigo steps away from his locker, no smile to decorate his face this time. Toshiro ignores him as he reaches to twirl in his locker combination.

'You know when people usually go out on a date, they at least _call _the other person or maybe pick up when the _other _person calls,' Ichigo says casually, not looking at Toshiro either.

'I've been busy,' Toshiro says curtly and he makes to open his locker. That's when Ichigo grabs his hand and pulls it away from that. Toshiro quickly sweeps an eye over the corridor and notices that there is barely anyone around. Where did they all disappear to all of a sudden?

'I'm not used to rejection, Toshiro,' he says softly.

'Oh yeah? Well it stings so get used to it,' Toshiro says icily and tries to pull free but Ichigo is stronger than he looks.

'You're such an enigma, Toshiro,' he murmurs and raises a hand to gently cup one of the icy boy's tender cheeks. Toshiro pulls away instantly. 'You're happy one moment and sad the next. You rage and snarl and bite at one point and then, you're as meek and playful as a kitten. Who are you really?'

'I'm a guy who wants you to fucking back off,' he growls. He does not want to be toyed today. _Especially _not today. Ichigo shakes his head sadly.

'You're not like the other guys I've gone out with, Toshiro,' he insists and pulls him closer, nuzzling his hair in that soft shag of white hair. Toshiro makes a small noise in surprise. 'I can't help but be drawn to you and I've never, _ever _felt this way before about anyone. I-I usually don't mind rejection. I don't. I'm not used to it and it usually doesn't faze me at all. But you…when you reject me it's like you're rending my heart to pieces.'

'What are you saying, Ichigo?' Toshiro can't help but whisper. He realizes he's trembling and fears the worst to escape Ichigo's lips. Whatever he may sense, Toshiro can't guarantee he'll act rationally.

'I-I think I may be falling in love with you,' Ichigo murmurs so softly it's a wonder Toshiro could hear him. Catching him off guard, Toshiro pulls away from him, suddenly and quickly.

'You just got to know me. How can you _possibly_ be in love with me?' he says bitterly. He knows he's being harsh but he can't help letting his emotions get carried away at a time like this. It's his parent's death anniversary for God's sake! Doesn't anyone realize that he isn't stable today and they shouldn't spring up mind-boggling confessions like that on him?

'The last time I felt like this was with Byakuya,' Ichigo says quietly as he takes a step towards him. Toshiro instinctively takes a step back. 'I can never forget this feeling. Like nothing else matters but being with you. Please, Toshiro, you must understand what I'm going through right now!'

'Get…away from me,' Toshiro rasps, his hands in tight fists. Ichigo's face transforms to one of hurt.

'Leave me alone, Ichigo! It's bad enough I have to remember my parents died today and now you come along and…'

'Didn't you ever feel this way about Karin?'

He hit his last nerve.

'I will hurt you, Ichigo,' Toshiro whispers dangerously, his eyes narrowing. 'And none of your stupid gang members can save you from me.'

Ichigo lays a hand on Toshiro's locker and gives him a painful glance before departing. Toshiro is still shaking as he reaches his locker again. He wipes his eyes. Why is he crying? He never cries about stupid things before. He promised himself he wouldn't let Ichigo fall for him and yet here he is, hurting Ichigo worse than Karin had ever hurt him.

Karin…

He leans his head against his locker. It was this very day, that Toshiro himself had said the word 'love' to someone very special to him. And that very person had broken him mind, body and soul. How can Ichigo remind him of her? How can he…

He's late for class. He opens his locker, he finds yet another roll of paper atop of his books. But what shocks him is a gorgeous red, red rose lying on top of it. He picks it up gingerly and inhales its scent deeply. Red roses are his favorite. They remind him that despite all the thorns on it, it still manages to be one of the most beautiful flowers he's ever seen. He picks up the paper and reads the latest poem:

_**Don't let them see your tears.**_

_**Look up, don't let them know your fears.**_

_**Keep up that brave façade.**_

_**It suits you; it's how heroes are made.**_

_**Two twin blocks made of dead grey stone.**_

_**Two twin mounds of earth; together and yet, alone.**_

_**I see you mourn for them,**_

_**But do you know, that I mourn for you not them?**_

_**You're still alive, please be happy.**_

_**You're still loved, please do smile.**_

_**Because if you don't,**_

_**Then how can I live?**_

Toshiro can feel a lump form in his throat. He's still clutching the rose tightly as he rereads the poem. For once, after a very long time, he wonders who this person is. Is it someone close to him or someone he doesn't know? Is it a friend or an enemy? It is Karin (he gulps) or Ichigo? And he had just treated Ichigo like dirt. He wants to cry again but instead, he brings the nose close it his face and breathes it in again, as if trying to drown himself in its intoxicating fragrance. Poor Ichigo…


	11. Truth Hurts Like The Bitch Who Tells It

He's late, he's late, he can't believe he's late! He's never late for his extra classes with Gin! They're the highlight of his day and right now, he's having the worst day of his life. Ichigo has just told him that he loves him, Grimmjow is avoiding him, Izuru is busy with Ikkaku in trying to get their assignment together, Momo is having a battle of the tongue with Rukia and to top it off, someone spilled coffee down his front and he had to go to the lost and found to borrow a shirt. And the only one they had was an indigo blue shirt that said 'Kiss me! I'm Irish' so he never saw the end of mocking jokes saying he isn't Irish but an alien or an albino and whatever crap. Yep, he _definitely _needed t be around Gin to feel better today.

'I will _kill_ Momo for making me come today,' Toshiro snarls under his breath as he sprints down the hall. He's just thankful that the corridors are empty so he doesn't have to deal with people gawking at his shirt and asking him if he has to go to the men's room that badly. If he uses the left wing, he'll probably get there faster. He jumps a trashcan and swings into the next hall when…

_CRASH! BANG! THUD!_

'Ouch! Watch where you're going, you klutz!' Karin and Toshiro say angrily in unison as they rub their sore bodies. Upon seeing who they had crashed into, their faces color scarlet. Karin quickly begins to collect her books and notes that had fallen. Toshiro leaps to his feet, feeling awkward and realizes that he should help her but then again, he should probably leave before he said something unforgivable. But his mouth betrays him.

'Let me help,' he blurts out and starts picking up her binder which had skidded a few feet away upon the collision. Karin looks at him in surprise as she rises to her feet and accepts her folder gratefully.

'Thank…you?' she says uncertainly. As she touches her folder, her hand accidently makes contact with his and they both retract their hand, causing the binder to tumble to the ground. Karin bends to pick it up herself and as she straightens, she blushes as she looks right into Toshiro's deep, penetrating eyes. Those eyes that always seem to make her melt with their intense gaze. She looks away,noting wanting to remain under their spell for long. The silence between them is getting uncomfortable so without another word, Toshiro makes to walk past her.

'Toshiro, wait!' Karin cries out before she can stop herself. Surprisingly, he does. But he doesn't turn around to look at her. She doesn't blame him. After what she did, how can she expect him to even stand being around her? But then, she needs to straighten things out with him. Otherwise, it will haunt her for the rest of her life.

'If you have anything to say, say it quick. I don't have all day,' he says quietly. He had made up his mind long ago that he didn't want to hear anything from her. No excuses. No explanations. He wanted nothing to do with her. But he can't help feeling sorry for her and yearning to give her a second chance. He's known her for so long and they had a good thing going. Can she still be the same person he had known and fallen for? It's a question he wants answered and at the same time, he prefers to remain in the dark about it. The answer scares him.

'Do you remember that day?' she says. Startled by the question, Toshiro looks back at her and sees she's looking down at her books, shaking uncontrollably. 'This very day last year, Toshiro? Do you remember what you said to me?'

'I can never forget, Karin,' he utters harshly. 'It's the reason what you did tore me up so much.'

She flinches slightly.

'Toshiro, I didn't mean to hurt you…' she starts.

'But you did,' he cuts her off. Not because he wants to be cruel, but he doesn't want to know the truth. He 's been working on his hardened image for so long, the truth will probably cause it to crumble and turn him into a vulnerable creature again. And that's the last thing he wants.

'I came over to your place to comfort you,' she presses on. Toshiro wants to clamp his hands over his ears but it's too late. He's already transported to that time with her. He can tell she's reliving it too by the hazy look in her eyes. 'You were trying hard not to break down so I kissed you to make you feel better. Then we kissed again and again until…'

She can't finish. She's almost choking on the memory now but she doesn't have to say the rest. The event is already replaying in their minds. Toshiro gasps as he remembers removing Karin's shirt then, how she had pulled his shirt off and ran her fingers over his chest. He had then laid her gently on his bed as he made to remove her jeans. She had kept him distracted as she twirled her fingers in his hair and whispered words of encouragement to him as he fumbled with his own pants. Her gasps had aroused him as he had entered her. And once they had reached their climax, Toshiro had leaned in close to her ear.

'I love you, Karin, and I'll never leave you,' he had whispered. She had just giggled and kissed him on the cheek. It had not been the reaction he had wanted but at least she didn't say anything cruel. But if she had, it would have been better than what she did next. Throughout the rest of school, it was like he didn't exist to her. She greeted him and hung out with him when he asked her too but otherwise, she stayed away from him. Summer holidays came and it was like she had completely disappeared. Whenever he had called her, he would always reach her answering machine. If he went over to her place, she was asleep, away or visiting family. Something was just not right. So one day, he followed her to a nearby ice cream parlor and what he saw made his entire world break like a china figurine. He had seen Karin, the love of his life, with Luppi, who had his arms around her and she didn't seem to mind or even remember that she had a boyfriend. Toshiro didn't want to believe it but how could he not when it was biting him right in the face, forcing him to watch this horror.

The break-up soon came quickly and painlessly. He had wanted to do it himself but he would just break down and cry when he'd start. Karin had been confused and tried to help him but he had pushed her away, even abused her. She was hurt but she tried not to let it affect her, hoping he was just going through a phase. He couldn't believe that she could still pretend to care about him after what she was doing to him behind his back. How could she be such a…a…even the word slut is too polite to describe what she did to him!

Momo ended up announcing the break-up to her herself. It had been quite a scene. When Izuru had walked in on Toshiro attempting to drink rat poison, he immediately called up Momo and they confronted him. Once he had spilled to both of them of what had happened, Momo had stormed to her place and literally banged the door down. Thankfully, Karin had answered and was surprised to find Momo slapping her across the face. She had stared at the fuming girl in amazement.

'How DARE you, you bitch!' Momo had seethed, steam literally coming out of her ears. 'Did you even care about him or is he just one of the guys you like to play around with and then move onto the next one!'

'Hinamori…'she had stammered but was met with another slap.

'You just broke my Toshiro's heart and you don't even deny it! Admit it, you're cheating on him!' Momo had screeched. Karin had just stared at her stunned. She had then looked at Toshiro who had been standing behind her, not daring to look at Karin. Izuru had been rubbing his shoulders to comfort him and glaring at her.

'Toshiro, I'd never-!' Karin had cried out to him but Toshiro had turned away from her. Thick tears had begun to pour from his eyes.

'It's over, Karin,' he had murmured and had wrapped his arms around himself. Karin had reached out to touch him but Momo had pushed her back.

'Stay away from him,' she had threatened. 'You've done enough damage.'

Karin had stuck to what Momo had asked her to do. Throughout summer and for half the school semester, she had stayed away from Toshiro. But when she had seen him again at lunch that day, she couldn't help calling him and reliving the good old times. She missed him. After that call, she vowed to never try to contact him again. It had been obvious he wanted nothing to do with her. She had been going strong until now. Until Toshiro is standing right in front of her, wearing his usual intense gazes that never fail to capture her heart and she can't help try to explain why she did what she did then. It's not like she has to, she _needs _to.

'Toshiro,' she says slowly as she comes right up in his face and he makes no moves to pull away. She can see the beads of perspiration form on his temples. 'When we did what we did, I didn't know I was going to hurt you. It…it was my first time and I was scared. And when you told me you loved me, I thought it wasn't real. I thought…is he serious? How can he just say that when…when I don't feel…the same…' she takes a gulp as she feels his body stiffen. 'I panicked. I didn't know who to turn to except…Luppi. I never told you when we were going out but Luppi was…is my best friend. He's been there for me through thick and thin and when I told him everything that had happened between us, that's when I realized…that…I didn't love you. I…loved someone else.'

She didn't have to say who. Toshiro had guessed it from the way she had looked at Luppi that day at the ice cream parlor. It had been the look on her face that had literally shattered his sanity. It had been one of pure bliss and happiness. That she wanted to be nowhere else but in his arms. Like _he _was her boyfriend instead of Toshiro.

'I'm so, so sorry, Toshiro,' she says and she tries to hug him. He holds her arms away from her and looks her straight in the eyes. She gasps. His eyes are no longer dazed and clouded but bright and full of fury, like he's trying to control himself from doing something dangerous. Suddenly, being around him made her very tense and scared.

'Save it, Karin,' he says coldly and pushes her hands away as he takes a step back from her. 'I would've cared then and forgiven you but now, I'm no longer the Toshiro you remember. He's gone. You destroyed him back then. I hope you're happy.'

'Toshiro, no! Please! Wait!' she pleads.

'I'm done with waiting, Karin. Go find another guy to torment. It's what you're good at.'

She finally lets out the sob that's been tearing her throat all this time as Toshiro leaves her all alone in the corridor. Left her to drown in her guilt and sorrow.

'She deserves it,' he thinks bitterly. 'She deserves to feel like this. Doesn't she?' He gazes up at Gin's office door, daring himself to knock.

Doesn't she?

_**Sorry Toshi is getting hurt so much but it's all part of the story plan! I have it all plotted out and I'm trying to find time to complete it as soon as possible! I want to get to the end myself cuz I tend to create stories by coming up with the end first^^**_

_**Please keep reading! I promise it'll be worth it! Oh, and I hate Toshiro and Karin pairing but I just had to make this to add a little spice to the concoction. It's my specialty hehehe. Anyways, enjoyyyy!**_


	12. Couch

Gin looks towards the door, a bored look on his face.

'Come on in, Toshiro-kun, the door is open,' he says casually as he finishes clearing up his desk. He raises an eyebrow as he eyes Toshiro's shirt.

'Very…interesting,' he manages to say, trying to hold in his laughter. 'Where can I get one of those?'

'Ha, ha, you're hilarious.' Toshiro rolls his eyes and then stops in his tracks as he takes in the small office. Something is off about the setting. Like there is something new about it. Gin grins as he notes the perplexed look on his student's face.

'Notice anything different?' he says slyly and indicates his head to a corner. Toshiro looks in the direction and realizes that there's a couch there. It isn't big and luxurious but compact and very comfortable. It's a deep royal purple two seater with cushy armrests. Toshiro takes a step towards it but then looks at Gin, who's admiring the piece.

'Found it at a sale just yesterday,' he states and runs a hand over one of its arms. 'I'm a sucker for purple things. Didn't cost much each but it gives this dinky little office a homey feel, doesn't it?'

'It sure does,' Toshiro says hollowly. The events of what had just happened are still fresh in his mind. He makes to sit towards his usual desk, his mind in a whirl.

'I thought we'd sit on the couch and study today, Toshiro-kun,' Gin says slowly and plops down on the couch, stretching his arms out on either side and crossing his legs. Toshiro envies him for being so calm and collected and carefree. He'd give anything to be like that right now. 'It's good to be comfortable while one studies, wouldn't you say?'

Toshiro doesn't know whether he can relax right now. As he sits next to Gin, their legs touch and Toshiro has to fight the urge from turning a deep crimson. He sneaks glances at Gin from the corner of his, taking in that gorgeous specimen of a man next to him. He can't believe that he of all people is lucky enough to spend time with _him_. Gin is wearing a plain white shirt today which is untucked from his trousers. He has unknotted his red tie and it is hanging loosely round his neck. He must have a thing for suits and ties. Not that Toshiro minds. It just makes him look even sexier. A guy in a suit, and especially if it's Gin, is utterly irresistible and oh so delicious.

And yet, as he opens his book to attempt a few sums, he can't help his mind wandering to Karin. All this time, he had been dreading to hear what she had to say. That maybe she might just forget and move on, like what he's trying to do. But no. she just had to pursue him and tell him the truth.

The truth…

People weren't kidding when they said the truth hurts. And Toshiro is hurting bad right now. Not even the presence of Gin can lighten the heaviness settling in his heart right now. He had already decided that for a fact, Karin doesn't love him anymore. But then, she just had to spring the fact that not only is she not in love with him, but she's in love with someone else. Someone she didn't even bother telling him about. But what hurt the most, is not the fact that she cheated on him or that she just played around with him, but that she didn't think he was worth telling the truth to. She never told him and he had to find out the hard way. He grips his pencil a bit too tightly as he writes the answer to an equation. He was never good enough for her. If he thought she had hurt him badly last time, she can't imagine the pain she's putting him through right now on the same day.

'Toshiro-kun, you alright? You look kind of pale,' Gin observes as he shifts a strand of hair form his face. Toshiro shivers. Gin then places a hand on his forehead and a number of explosions go off inside Toshiro. Damn, he's so sensitive to Gin's lightest touches!

'You don't have a fever,' he comments and removes his hand. Toshiro holds back a whine when the cool and gentle hand is taken away from his skin that is always yearning for his touch. 'Is this got to do with something related to school or too much work? Is it the extra classes? Are they getting in the way of your concentration in your other classes? Perhaps we should discontinue them…'

'No!' Toshiro says suddenly and then almost immediately clamps his mouth shut. Gin gives him a curious look. 'I mean, I-I'm fine with the extra classes, Ichimaru-san. It's is just…personal problems, that's all.'

'Oh.' He puts a hand on Toshiro's notebook, dangerously close to his own small hand. Toshiro stares down at his hand as if willing his own to reach out and grab it. 'Do you want to talk about it?'

Toshiro looks up at his face, which is a mixture of concern and worry. Gin Ichimaru, of all people, is worried about _him_? His heart is beating faster than any other time he can recall.

'I-I'd rather not…sir.'

'Oh, alright,' he sighs in disappointment and then pokes him in the ribs. 'You're such a closed book, Toshiro-kun.' He notices Toshiro had flinched when he had poked him. He grins and pokes him again. 'And ticklish too, by the looks of it.'

'S-s-stop!' Toshiro gasps as Gin begins to tickle him. His books fall out of his lap as he tries to get away from his teacher. But at the same time, he's enjoying the attention and the feather touches of this man. It's making his mind go blank of all his problems and focus only on Gin's pleasant face.

'Not until I have you laughing and smiling again, Toshiro-kun!' Gin says mischievously and tickles him down his sides. Soon, Toshiro is laughing and swatting Gin's hands away. Their hands end up getting entangled in each other's and that makes them laugh even harder.

'Thanks, Ichimaru-san, I really needed this,' Toshiro says happily and he leans back on the couch, bringing his feet close to his chest.

'Really? So what was troubling you, Toshiro?' Gin says slyly, dropping the honorific and he leans in close, his face merely inches from Toshiro's and his hand on his thin thigh. His eyes are partly open and Toshiro forces himself to look into those red, red irises that seem to hypnotize him. Who cares about Karin? She can go fuck every guy for all he cared. He just wanted Gin right now so, so badly.

'Oh, you know,' Toshiro says casually as he too leans forward and is now crawling towards Gin on all fours. 'Girls. Relationships. The usual. Not that that matters right now.'

Gin smiles uncertainly now. Maybe this is going a bit too far. He leans back and soon the armrest is digging into his back but Toshiro keeps coming towards him.

'So, you're feeling better now?' he asks, trying to keep his voice calm and gives out a startles cry as Toshiro lays a hand on his knee. Toshiro's mind is blank of all reasonable thinking. The only thing running through it is Gin's perfectly sculpted face.

'Better than I thought I would,' Toshiro murmurs he's now completely in Gin's lap, his body pressing against his. Gin shudders. This is so wrong and yet, he can't help loving the feel of this lithe body against his. He controls himself from wrapping his arms around the boy. But that doesn't stop Toshiro from taking Gin's face in his hands and raising it to his. Toshiro is standing on his knees in between Gin's legs and has tilted his face up to his. His eyes are soft and hazy, like he's lost in a dream. Gin can feel panic rising in his chest at what might be coming next. And sure enough, Toshiro is bringing his face down, his lips pursing. Gin suddenly grabs his hands in both of his and is soon towering over Toshiro, whose eyes snap back into focus.

'Gin…'he murmurs in confusion. Gin lets go of his hands, panting hard. He covers his eyes with his hand and stands up, his back to Toshiro.

'It's Ichimaru-san to you, Hitsugaya-kun,' he says curtly, still not wanting to look at him. Toshiro is stunned. This is the first time he's called him by his surname. His cheeks grow hot as he realizes what he had almost done. He touches his fingers to his lips and he realizes he's trembling. He's feeling horrified. What had he done?

'You should leave,' Gin exclaims and returns to his desk. Toshiro feels he should say something but nothing is coming to his mind. So he collects his things and walks to the door. He turns around but Gin has turned away from him in his chair. Once outside, Toshiro leans against the wall; his books topple from his hand as he uses them to cover his face.

'Shit, shit, shit!' he screams inside his head. 'What the fuck did I just do? I'm such a fucktard! I fucking just screwed up our class! I'm such a…'

He whimpers. Things just couldn't get any worse from now.


	13. One Tequila, Two Tequila

_**This chapter is a dedication to one of my favorite movie scenes!^^ you can say I'm plagiarizing but I prefer to call it inspiration. Trust me, the movie is brilliant. In case you all are wondering, it's '27 dresses'. Give it a watch. You won't regret it. **_

'Maybe today isn't so bad,' Toshiro thinks to himself as he swirls the content of his glass before downing it in one gulp and then shuddering. He never does like to drink but at times like this, it feels good to go to a bar and drown one's sorrows in a glass of alcohol. He's not that particular about what he drinks but he usually prefers wine. It seems safer than trying tequila or vodka. He didn't want to go home drunk and wasted. His grandma might suspect something. But then again, he's been doing this almost every year so he's had practice getting away with drinking.

Nobody, not even Momo or Izuru, is aware that instead of staying at home to mourn for his parents, Toshiro would take the bus to Togetsu Town, a small little place just on the outskirts of Karakura Town, to drink away the night at a bar. He tried it once at a party and felt ashamed to like it so much. He can't imagine what his friends would think of him if they ever saw him drink. So he goes to the bar in Togetsu Town where no one he knows will recognize him. He doesn't know whether he does this every year for the alcohol or perhaps to get away from all the familiar faces and maybe immerse himself in a new place where nobody knows him. He needs that feeling more than anything right after the incredibly lousy day he's had today.

First Ichigo, then Karin and finally Gin. No matter how many times he tries to assure himself it can't be as bad as he thinks, Gin's face comes swimming back, making his heart ache. How could he have had no control over himself back there? He inspects his cup as if magically expecting it to be full again. He's only had two and the room is already starting to spin. He looks around the bar. It isn't that full. It usually never is. A stereo is playing old music from the 70's in the background, adding to the archaic feel to the dingy bar. It's a nice feel though. Like he's been transported from his time into another, where he doesn't have to worry about what others think of him or about his problems far, far away at home. he looks to his left. The bar counter is almost empty save for a man with blonde hair that looks like a helmet on his head. He takes a swing of his drink, the bartender eyes him with concern.

'I think you've had enough, Shinji,' he starts to say.

'Shut up, Hanatoro,' he snaps and slides the glass in his direction. 'Pour me another one.'

Toshiro sighs. Some people just didn't know when to stop. He looks past Shinij and sees a blue-haired moody figure brooding over a tankard of beer. Maybe he's a bit too drunk but that person looks strangely familiar. The person looks in his direction with a bored look and upon taking him in, his eyes widen. Toshiro's does the same.

'You've got to be kidding me,' Toshiro murmurs out loud. Grimmjow blinks rapidly as he tries to process who he's seeing across the table. Is that really Toshiro? And _drinking_?

'Toshiro?' Grimmjow says in surprise.

'Please tell me I'm just drunk,' Toshiro moans.

'We must both be drunk. And I don't start seeing things until my 3rd drink,' Grimmjow exclaims and strolls up to him hesitantly. He still remembers his last encounter. His cheek still burns where Toshiro had smacked him. Right now, both are on fire and he's just glad that it's too dark for Toshiro to see. 'Mind if I-!'

'Pull up a chair. It's not like my day can get any worse,' Toshiro says callously as he returns to staring moodily at the pyramid of drinks decorated behind the counter. Grimmjow just stands there, feeling hurt and awkward. Toshiro feels Grimmjow's uneasiness and sighs.

'I'm not mad at you, Grimmjow,' he explains calmly and looks him straight in the eye. 'I've just been having a bad day so it's not your fault. Don't make me feel bad for snapping at you and sit down before I change my mind.'

Grimmjow is not used to taking orders but he can sense the sorrow and strain in Toshiro voice so he quietly obeys. He takes a deep draught from his cup as they sit in silence. Toshiro fingers the stem of his wine glass as he replays the events of today in his head. How the hell did he end up in a bar with Grimmjow. He would laugh if he wasn't so pissed off at himself for his actions with Gin today. He covers his face with his hand. If there is a prize for the dumbest fuck, he'd take the prize hands down no competition.

'I thought you didn't drink,' Grimmjow says suddenly. Toshiro parts the fingers covering his eyes to look at the teen.

'I don't,' he says, annoyed at being interrupted in his thoughts. 'It's just once in a while I like to indulge a little and get away from the crowds.'

'Oh.' Another spell of silence. Toshiro can't seem to go get a grip of his trail of thoughts again so, exasperated; he decides to continue talking to Grimmjow.

'What're you doing here anyway?' he asks. Grimmjow takes a sip of his beer.

'I come to drink?' he says perplexedly and raises his glass to Toshiro.

'I mean, why here? Isn't there a bar in Karakura Town you can crash at?'

'If you don't want me to be here right now, Toshiro, you can just say so.'

'No, no, it's not that. Alright, sorry if it sounds like that but I'm just curious. I'm not trying to be rude.'

Grimmjow surveys the boy for a minute before answering.

'I come here on Wednesdays to visit my mom,' he says casually. 'My parents are divorced so they've divided the week to share me equally. She doesn't know I come here at night to drink. That's my secret.'

He laughs bitterly and takes another swing of beer. Toshiro realizes that he never saw Grimmjow throughout school today. He'd been so busy juggling the events of today he didn't notice the blue-haired bully at all, let alone think about him and what happened yesterday. His cheeks begin to burn up as he remembers.

'Listen, Grimmjow, about yesterday…' he starts but Grimmjow holds up a hand.

'It's alright, Toshiro,' he says gently. 'I kinda deserved it. You were just trying to be friendly and I was being an ass. I shouldn't tell you what to do and I'm sorry.'

'Grimmjow…'

'Hey! I'm apologizing here and if you know me, this should actually come as a shock to you!'

Toshiro shuts his mouth and returns to swirling his finger around the rim of his glass.

'So why are you here, Toshiro?' Grimmjow asks out of curiosity. Toshiro raises his empty glass to him as if for a toast.

'It's my parent's death anniversary,' he says simply. 'So I'm celebrating.'

'Not on an empty glass you are,' Grimmjow scoffs as he eyes the glass in his petite hand. He gestures to Hanatoro to come to them. 'Yo! Hanatoro! Two shots of your special tequila slammer! And keep 'em coming!'

'Grimmjow!' Toshiro sputters as Hanatoro nods and hurries off. 'I don't have tequila! I don't think I can hold it!'

'Come on, Toshiro!' Grimmjow says coolly as Hanataro returns with two small glasses of pink tinted tequila with a slice of strawberry on the side. 'You gotta live a little sometimes. It's your parent's death anniversary! I don't think they'd want you to stop having fun now, would they?'

Toshiro scowls at Grimmjow as he slides him a glass and raises his to grin at Toshiro. Toshiro then sighs and picks up his glass.

'Fine,' he snaps. 'But just one!'

* * *

Toshiro and Grimmjow slam their glasses down at the same time and whistle loudly. The collection of glasses around them tremble at the force.

'I finished that one faster than you did!' Grimmjow gasps.

'No way!' Toshiro argues, swaying slightly on his stool. 'All three of you finished after me!'

'Stop bullshitting!'

'You stop bullshitting!' Toshiro squints at the glasses surrounding them. 'How many have we had so far?'

'I lost count after 5…' Grimmjow says groggily as he tries hard to remember but his mind is too muddled up to let him.

'I think we should stop…'Toshiro says slowly. Hanatoro comes up with two more glasses.

'Should I stop bringing more?' he asks anxiously, noticing how the two men are getting drunk by the minute.

'Are you kidding?' Grimmjow roars and thrusts a glass in Toshiro's hand. 'Bottoms up!'

* * *

Toshiro slams down his glass for like the 20th time. He grins broadly at Grimmjow who's giving him just a goofy grin as he is.

'Alright,' Toshiro says thickly and sticks out his index finger. 'I hate chocolate. With a passion! And I like the color pink but only guys who got style can pull it off!'

'Dude! I like pink too!' Grimmjow cries out in ecstasy. 'But, like, being a badass and all, I gotta like black and stuff but to be honest, I prefer purple but nobody gets me about that! I mean, it's such a pretty color!'

'I get you!' Toshiro says enthusiastically. 'Cuz see, nobody knows I have a stuffed penguin under my bed which I can't sleep without!'

'That's so cute!' Grimmjow gushes. Toshiro blushes and giggles as he looks into his glass like a telescope. That's when a new song begins to play on the stereo, making Toshiro sit bolt upright. He begins to bop his head to the tune and snaps his fingers.

'I love this song! It's…'

'Benny and the Jets!' Grimmjow finishes and starts shaking his head to the tune too.

'You've heard of Elton John?' Toshiro says incredulously.

'Heard of him? I worship the very ground he walks on!' Grimmjow boasts. The man soon begins to sing. 'Aw man! I love the lyrics!'

'She's got electric boots and mohair shoes you know I read it in a magazaaennee, yea!' Toshiro sings along, snapping both his fingers along with the tune.

'B-B-B-Benny and the Jets!' Grimmjow belts out as he stands up on his stool and then walks onto the counter. He does a crazy dance move like he's air guitaring. Toshiro laughs and claps his hands. Hanatoro rushes over.

'Ummmm, sir, you're not supposed to dance on the counters here,' he says meekly.

'Shut up, Hanatoro!' Grimmjow says and he pulls Toshiro onto the counter in one move. Toshiro squeals.

'Grimmjow! I can't dance!' he says, embarrassed at the people that are now staring at them.

'It's a first time for everything, Toshiro!' Grimmjow say as he nudges the small boy with his hip. 'Everyone knows how to dance! Come on, together with me!'

Toshiro soon gets into the rhythm and begins to shake his hips. He swung his arms to his sides elegantly.

'Tosh! Wicked dance moves!' Grimmjow hoots as he shimmies up to his partner.

'I guess I know a thing or two,' Toshiro says proudly and blushes slightly as he and Grimmjow slide across the counter with an audience cheering them on.

'These guys are awesome!' someone shouts out as everyone is now swinging their head to the music.

'Benny!' Grimmjow and Toshiro yell.

'Benny!' the crowd yells back.

'Benny!'

Benny!'

Benny, Benny, Benny and the Jets!' Toshiro and Grimmjow finish as Grimmjow slides off the counter laughing. Toshiro whirls one more time before toppling over and landing in Grimmjow's arms laughing his head off. The crowd claps one more time, some even patting Grimmjow on the back for a 'great show' before going about their business again. Still laughing, Grimmjow sets Toshiro back on his stool and the two of them sit lapsing in a fit of laughter. Grimmjow stops laughing and smiles at Toshiro.

'Did you know Elton John is gay?' he says slowly, gazing intently at the gorgeous boy before him. Toshiro's cheeks are tinted rosy and his skin is glowing with happiness. His beautiful mouth is turned up in a cute smile while is nose is scrunched up in an adorable way as he laughs. When he stops, he fixes Grimmjow with his large teal orbs that are sparkling with life. He's almost like a god…

'What's that got to do with right now, Grimmjow?' he says cheerily. Before he can say anything, Grimmjow sweeps in and kisses him on the cheek. Stunned, Toshiro touches his cheek and stares at Grimmjow in horror as if he's been violated.

'I've always admired him for being so open about his sexuality,' Grimmjow murmurs lustfully and this time dips in to kiss him on the lips. Toshiro strikes him across the face, the happiness gone from his face to be replaced by fear and anger. Grimmjow slowly looks back at him, his face solemn. Then, all of a sudden, his face turns into an angry mask as he grabs Toshiro by the collar and drags him to the back side of the bar. Toshiro struggles against his grip, trying to pry it loose with his hand but Grimmjow's hold is like vice.

'G-Grimmjow,' Toshiro pleads, too drunk to care if he sounds helpless. Grimmjow grinds his body against his small one. Toshiro cries out.

'Stop taunting me, you,' he says in a strained voice as his hand goes under Toshiro's shirt and makes it ride up his back. 'Stop acting like you're too good for me. I deserve you, god damn it! Stop making me run after you! Don't I make you happy, Toshiro? Don't I?'

'Grimmjow, s-s-stop! You're hurting me!' Toshiro whimpers as he pushes his legs off on the wall behind him but it's all futile.

'Shut up!' Grimmjow slurs. 'Stop making me look like the bad guy-!' a hand comes out of nowhere and lands on Grimmjow's shoulder, making him turn around forcefully.

'Let him go, Grimmjow Jaguerjack,' Gin says quietly as he looks at the blue-haired teen with a deadly severity. Grimmjow gulps in fear but he maintains his stance.

'And why should I?' he spits in his teacher's face. 'You can't tell me what to do! We're not in school!'

'Let him go,' Gin repeats, not fazing.

'Make me,' Grimmjow says stubbornly.

'I was afraid you were going to say that,' Gin says sadly, shaking his head. He takes a step back. Grimmjow looks at him curiously. Then, before he can react, Gin lands a punch on his jaw. It must've been forceful because Grimmjow slumps to the ground and doesn't move. Gin bends down to inspect him and then looks up at Toshiro.

'Looks like I'll be playing chauffeur tonight,' he says casually.


	14. It Isn't Right

Gin hums a tune as he turns the wheel to round a corner on the road. Toshiro groans as his head spins with the car. He isn't feeling so good.

'Hey! No throwing up here! I just got my car cleaned!' Gin cries out and pulls out a sick bag from the glove compartment, handing it to Toshiro. He accepts it but the need to throw up passes. Still, he clutches onto the bag even more tightly. He gazes out the window, trying to find something familiar about it.

'How're we going to drop Grimmjow home?' he slurs as his head rolls back. Gin gently brings his head back into place.

'Don't tilt your head. You might choke on your vomit,' he advises and focuses on the road again. 'We already dropped him home. Thankfully, his mother believed me when I said he got into a fight. He must get into a lot of scrapes that even his mother is not affected by it.'

'That's Grimmjow for you,' Toshiro jokes and laughs a little. 'Always the badass. What a jackass. He tried to kiss me, did you know?'

'Mm-hmm,' Gin acknowledges as he avoids a fast car. 'Lousy drivers…'

'I didn't know that he liked me,' Toshiro continues to babble. 'We did a project together too. I always wondered why he was being nice. Shoulda guessed it. God, I was stupid. But then, you always fall for those who never love you back.'

Gin gives him a worried look. Toshiro doesn't notice. He just looks out the window again.

'Do you know where my house is?' he says. 'Not many people can find it, especially at night. It's on Sodo Street.'

'Yes, you said that at least 7 times, Toshiro-kun.'

'Tch. Call me Toshiro! We're friends, Gin! You helped me so you're my friend now.'

'Alright, Toshiro.'

'I have a lot of friends. Actually, not really. Ever since my parents died, I don't talk to people much. It's their death anniversary today. I tend to go to Togetsu Town to celebrate with a drink but I think I went overboard today.' He giggles. 'Hey! You found the street!'

'I'm kinda familiar with it,' Gin murmurs. He needs to get Toshiro home fast before he said something stupid or worse, ruined his car.

'What were you doing at the bar?' Toshiro chirps as he plays with the window, opening it and closing it.

'Stop doing that,' Gin says in a tired voice. 'I live just above the bar. It's like my second home.'

'I'm bad with directions,' Toshiro exclaims and tilts his head to the side as he looks at Gin. 'You kinda look like Tom Cruise from this-'

His face goes green and he covers his mouth with the paper bag and retches out his stomach into it.

'Oh great,' Gin groans and stops the car while rolling down the windows to let in some fresh air. Toshiro vomits for a while before finally stopping to stare goofily at Gin.

'Shoulda seen that coming, huh?' he murmurs. Gin grabs the bag, covers it up and tosses it into a nearby trashcan. Toshiro looks past him and sees a familiar site. He cries out in joy and points.

'That's my house!' he says happily and bounces in the car. Gin looks at the house and then back at Toshiro, raising his eyebrow.

'You sure?' he queries.

'Of course! Just because I'm drunk doesn't mean I can't recognize my own house!' Toshiro pouts and laughs again. He opens the door form his side and wobbles as he stands on the road. Gin gets out from his end and comes to Toshiro's side.

'You sure you can stand?' he asks with concern. Toshiro pushes his hands aside as he takes a few steps forward.

'I'm not that helpless!' Toshiro scoffs and attempts to take another step but tilts backwards and fall into Gin's arms. 'Alright maybe a little but it's not my fault the floor is leaning to the side. It's defected!'

'Sure it is,' Gin assures him as he grabs him from under his knees and supports his back with his other arm. 'How am I going to explain this to your family?'

'My grandma is asleep by now,' Toshiro chimes and points to his house as they make their way to the place. 'I keep a spare key with me in case I come home late. She thinks I'm in bed and she never comes to see if I'm asleep or not.'

'Lucky us. Where do you keep the keys?'

'In my back pocket.' He fishes it out and almost drops it but Gin catches it expertly without dropping the little drunk boy.

It's dark inside his house but despite being drunk, Toshiro guides him upstairs to his room. Gin looks around the room. It's small and bare, unlike most teenage boy's rooms. There are usually posters of girls in bikinis on the walls and football jerseys spilling out of drawers. Toshiro's room was neat and the walls were a nice blue, like as if his room is coated in a thin layer of ice. Just like the boy in his arms. Toshiro murmurs something about spaghetti in the fridge and Gin chuckles. He has to admit, Toshiro is unbelievably cute and vulnerable right now. He peels away the layers of sheets on the bed and gently lays the boy on the bed. Toshiro curls up on his side and turns away from Gin towards his window, whispering words that Gin can't make out.

'Sleep well, little ice boy,' he whispers as he quietly makes to sneak away.

'Gin…' Toshiro calls out in a strained voice. Gin stops in his tracks and turns around to face the boy. He could have sworn that the boy was fast asleep. 'Please don't go…'

'I-I have to, Toshiro-kun…'

'Please don't call me that. Call me Toshiro.'

'Alright. Toshiro, I have to go. You don't want me to stay.'

'But I _do _want you to stay,' he insists and sits up in his bed now. He stretches out a hand to Gin as if trying to catch him from a distance. 'You don't know what I want.'

'Well, what _do _you want, Toshiro?' He approaches the boy who seems to be shivering from something.

'I want _you_, Gin.'

It's Gin's turn to shiver now. He was dreading this. He realized that this boy has some strong feelings for him while they were in his office. He sees Toshiro as quite the brilliant pupil and wants what's best for him. But he doesn't think having an affair with his teacher would be the best thing. Imagine what people would say. No university would want a boy like him in their school and plus, no school would hire a pedophile. Not that he doesn't like Toshiro. He _does _like him. A lot. But as friends. He has respect for Toshiro and he hopes he has the same. He was hoping that maybe what had happened today was just a slip of the tongue or being carried away. He was planning to avoid Toshiro to help him get over him and then go back to being perhaps friends once things blew over. But then, he had seen Grimmjow assaulting him and something snapped inside him. For some reason, he felt the need to protect this boy from harm and he couldn't help himself going over and knocking Grimmjow. Could it be a sign? Could he feel something more for Toshiro as well? Maybe he does. Maybe he doesn't. But he knows better than to get involved with a student. It means trouble. And it could ruin the poor boy. Gin is not willing to sacrifice that. But right now, Toshiro is drunk out of his mind and when one is drunk, they tend to say the stupidest things. But other than being stupid, they are also the truth. And that is what Gin is dreading.

'I want you so _badly_, Gin,' Toshiro moans as he crawls across his bed to Gin.

'Toshiro, don't do anything stupid,' Gin warns, wanting to move but his feet are glued to the floor. The look in Toshiro's eyes are stopping him from moving. They look so hungry and lustful. Gin licks his lips.

'It doesn't matter what I do,' Toshiro says softly as he is now level with Gin, inches from his face. 'Because I love you, Gin. Deeply and passionately.'

And with that, he plunges into a kiss, forcing Gin's mouth open and sticking his tongue into the warm mouth. Gin's eyes pop open and he urges himself to push the boy away, to stop him from doing this. He accidently knocks a book from Toshiro's bedside table but he's too distracted to notice. For a minute, Gin was struggling with himself to move the boy away but a small part of him is actually enjoying this and begging for more action. Finally, after what seem like an eternity, Gin pulls away and Toshiro topples backwards into his bed. He laughs softly and his eyes close.

'That was nice,' he mutters as he attempts to pick himself up again but Gin pushes him back down gently.

'No, Toshiro, it wasn't,' he says almost bitterly. What the hell is he doing with Toshiro? It isn't right. It just isn't right…

'Why not?' Toshiro asks in surprise, his eyes wide with innocence.

Gin opens his mouth to answer but he has no answer. He's struck by his own realization. It _did _feel nice but if he said that, there's no stopping what Toshiro might do to get more. To want to try and be with him. And then there were their extra classes…

'Because it's not right,' Gin says firmly and for the second time today, he moves away from Toshiro. 'I have to go. And this time, don't pine for me.'

Toshiro blinks and Gin is gone.

'Gin?' he says softly, his hand suspended in front of him. 'Gin?'

But he's gone. Just like Karin. Just like his parents. And just like the reason to believe in true love.


	15. It All Comes Out In The End

_A crimson red apple looms before Toshiro in the darkness that seems to spread everywhere. It's like he's floating in nothingness. He swims towards the apple, trying his hardest to reach it. His fingers scarcely brush its smooth surface when a firm white hand comes out of the dark and grasps the apple, pulling it out of his reach. Toshiro looks up and sees that the hand belongs to a grinning fox-like man whose face is framed by elegant locks of silvery purple hair. The man tosses the apple in the hair and wags a finger at him._

'_Uh, uh, Toshiro,' Gin says mockingly and brings the apple to his lips. 'It's a forbidden fruit, remember? You cannot touch it…'_

_As he takes a bite of it, his hair changes to a violent shade of orange and his eyes open to reveal warm chocolate brown orbs. The man looks melancholy at Toshiro._

'_Please don't hurt me, Toshiro,' Ichigo whispers, wrapping his arms around his body as if he's cold. Toshiro reaches out a hand and Ichigo's hand suddenly shoots out to grab his wrist tightly. Toshiro cries out in alarm and panic. Ichigo's body broadens and his hair becomes a wild jungle of electric blue hair. His gentle eyes suddenly switch to angry blue ones._

'_I deserve you, god damn it!' Grimmjow spits at him as he smashes his lips against his Toshiro's trembling ones. 'I deserve you…'_

'_Toshiro…' whispers a voice behind him and he swivels around to see Karin weeping. 'Toshiro, please forgive me! Please…'_

'_Toshiro…' whisper an amalgamation of voices from Gin, Ichigo, Grimmjow and Karin. 'Toshiro…'_

Toshiro's eyes tear open as he forces himself out of bed, panting hard. He looks around him with furtive looks before dropping back onto his pillow, one arm over his burning eyes. The clogs in his brain finally start turning as he realizes that he has school to attend. He scrambles across his bed to look at the time on his cell phone. It's 3 p.m. He's missed school. And top of that, he's received at least 50 missed calls and messages from Izuru, Momo, Ichigo, _Grimmjow_ and _Gin_. His heart flips as he scrolls down the list of missed calls from Gin. Suddenly, the events of last night come rushing back to him and he groans. Not only did he screw around with Gin once that day but _twice_. He fucking tried to get it on with him _twice_ that day. And while he was drunk!

'Perfect,' he grumbles and turns to face the ceiling. 'Just fucking perfect! Happy death anniversary, mom and dad! Your son tried to have bloody sex the night you died! Yeah! And it's the second time! But wait, that's not the end of it! This time, it was with his _male _teacher! I hope you're proud of me!'

With that, he throws himself onto his pillow and bites into it. How can he ever look Gin in the face ever again? The doorbell suddenly causes him to jump out of bed. Without looking out his window to see who it might be, he trudges down the stairs to the door. Who could that be? It's probably Izuru and Momo coming to check up on him. He opens the door.

'Ichigo? What're you doing here?' he utters in disbelief. The prince shuffles his feet uncomfortably on the porch.

'I didn't see you at school today,' he murmurs so lowly Toshiro can barely hear him. 'I thought…it was probably what I had said to you…'

'Ichigo,' Toshiro groans and covers his face with his hand once more. 'It's not your fault! It was just one of those bad days yesterday and I just decided not to come to school today, that's all. So, why don't you…'

But before he can finish, his eyes travel to a figure approaching his house and he moans out loud before he can stop himself. Grimmjow is concentrating on the ground underneath him as he enters Toshiro's front yard, kicking a pebble ahead of him with every step. When he stops at the porch, he notices two pairs of legs and he looks him in confusion. His mouth curls into a sneer.

'What're _you_ doing here, carrot top?' he leers. Ichigo assumes an arrogant look on his face as he looks down at Grimmjow from the porch.

'I believe I'm here to see Toshiro and why he didn't attend school today,' he says in a miffed tone. 'After all, I _do _care about him.'

Grimmjow growls in his throat. He knows what Ichigo is up to. He's trying to make Grimmjow look like a callous idiot who doesn't give jack shit about Toshiro. Well he obviously doesn't know what had happened last night.

'I came to apologize, Toshiro,' he says, ignoring the curious look on Ichigo's face. 'About last night. I-I didn't mean to come onto you like that…'

'It's alright, Grimmjow,' Toshiro sighs and leans against the doorsill. 'People do stupid things when they are drunk.'

'Drunk? Last night? You two?' Ichigo's eyes narrow as he stomps down the steps to come eye to eye with Grimmjow. 'What the hell did you do last night, blue boy?'

'None of your business!' Grimmjow leers and shoves Ichigo away lightly since the guy is right in his face.

'Ichigo, nothing happened,' Toshiro says in a tired voice. 'Grimmjow just kissed me on the-!'

'You _kissed_ him?' Ichigo says incredulously as he swings his head from Toshiro to Grimmjow. The blue-haired bully grins as he sees the effect of this piece of information on the arrogant prince.

'So what, carrot top?' he says casually and watches in amusement as Ichigo turns red with anger. 'You got a problem with me getting a kiss first? What, you haven't gotten to kiss him yet and you're jealous?'

'Getting a kiss first? What's this all about?' Toshiro asks curiously, glancing at fuming Ichigo and then at grinning Grimmjow.

'It's nothing, Toshiro,' Ichigo flares as he stomps over to Grimmjow and grabs him by the jacket. 'This bastard just likes being a sore loser.'

'Loser?' Grimmjow barks. 'Look in a mirror first! Don't get all touchy 'cuz you're losing this bet!'

'I haven't lost yet, Jaguerjack!' Ichigo seethes, not releasing his grip on the smirking teen.

'Bet? What bet?' Toshiro's eyes widen. 'Hey, is this bet about me?'

The two boys say nothing as they continue to stare into each other with murder in their eyes. They haven't realized that Toshiro is starting to piece together what's going on between them.

'No…fucking…way…' Toshiro says hollowly. Ichigo and Grimmjow detect the change in his tone of voice and turn away from each other to see Toshiro shaking in the doorway.

'Hey, you alright?' Grimmjow queries.

'Toshiro?' Ichigo asks as he makes to come up the steps of the porch. Toshiro thrusts his hand out to stop him from coming any further. Ichigo stops.

'Don't come any closer,' Toshiro says furiously, trying to control his temper so he himself wouldn't go flying at Ichigo and rip him to shreds. 'I just had, the _worst _day anyone could _possibly_ have yesterday! _You _(he points at Ichigo) tell me that you love me and _you_ (he now points at Grimmjow) try to have sex with me at a bar! On top of that, my ex tells me that she never loved me and I tried to have sex with my teacher _while I was drunk_! Plus, it was my parent's death anniversary! And now, I find out you guys had a _bet _on who could win me over? Do I look like some kind of idiot to you guys! You know what? Screw love and screw you guys! I don't deserve to be treated like some lovesick bastard you can mess with whenever you feel like it! So go fuck each other 'cuz you sure as hell aren't getting any from me!'

With that, he slams the door shut in their faces with such force that the door wobbles in its frame. Wincing at the force, Ichigo looks at Grimmjow.

'You think he's really mad?' he whispers inquisitively. He hears another banging of a door and a string of curses coming from the window right above them.

'No shit Sherlock,' Grimmjow snaps angrily.

* * *

'Fucking, idiotic, good-for-nothing, bunch of lowlife, cock-sucking, dick-headed bastards!' Toshiro vents out as he kicks his bed and dressing table in anger. 'Like they've got nothing better to do than to fuck with my head! God! I hope they burn, then end up in hell and burn again!'

He lets out an angry cry as he kicks a journal on the floor and props it open. He's about to step over it when he notices something peculiar about it.

'This isn't my handwriting,' he muses and picks the book up to inspect it. 'I don't remember borrowing anyone's journal.' He flips it over and sees the name 'Jaguerjack' scrawled in the back. He rolls his eyes. He probably picked it up when he had stomped out of Grimmjow's place that day. He'll return it to him tomorrow, even if it means facing him again. He flips a page and pauses for a second. His thinks that maybe he's still drunk so he rubs his eyes and read the page again. No. It's still there, clear as day. He checks the name at the back again just to be sure. He returns to the page, his heart rattling against his ribcage.

_**So far and yet so close.**_

_**You are mine and yet you are not mine.**_

_**Is it a reality?**_

_**No.**_

_**Only a fatality.**_

Toshiro can't bring himself to read the rest but he knows a poem when he sees one.

'No, no, no,' he mutters, dread building up inside him. 'It can't be _him_. It just can't be him! It's probably just a coincidence! Yeah! A coincidence! But then, why can't I shake this funny feeling that I;m just kidding myself?'


	16. Shit Happens

'This is all your fault,' Ichigo says dully as he and Grimmjow trudge down the sidewalk, their hearts feeling heavy.

'Me? You're the one who was pushing me, Mr. Prince!' Grimmjow insists as he kicks a stone and it lands all the way on the other side of the road.

'I wouldn't have done it if you hadn't tried to make me jealous about you kissing Toshiro!' Ichigo snaps back.

'Aha! So you were jealous!'

'No I wasn't!'

'So the great prince was jealous!'

'I didn't say that!'

'But you just admitted it!'

'Shut up, Grimmjow!'

'You shut up!'

'No you!

'NO YOU!'

'NO-! Cut it out! We're starting to sound like some deranged married couple!'

Ichigo shudders. 'God forbid!'

'Yeah!...Hey! What do you mean by that?'

'Have you even _seen_ yourself? A guy like me can't be seen with a guy like you!' Ichigo perks his collar up as he says this. Grimmjow glares at him.

'Well sooorryy I'm not up to your standards, your highness!' Grimmjow utters, rolling his eyes and jamming his hands into his pockets. It's Ichigo's turn to glare at him now.

'Will you quit associating me with words like 'your highness' and 'the great prince'!' Ichigo says coldly. 'Not that it's insulting me but you're clearly mocking my status!'

'Oooo! Big words!' Grimmjow mocks and blows stray strands out of his eyes. 'I thought you like being called that!'

'Coming from you, not so much!'

'Ugh! What made you think Toshiro would ever be interested in a guy like you is bull crap!'

'You wanna know bull crap? Why would a guy like Toshiro hang out with a guy like you!'

'At least I don't make people follow me around like dogs!'

'At least I don't hide what I am!'

'I'm more of a man than you'll ever be, carrot top!'

'You tried to seduce Toshiro in a bar and I bet you were drunk! Wow! What a man, Jaguerjack!'

'Shut the fuck up, Kurasaki!'

Grimmjow stops in his tracks and swings around to face Ichigo, anger apparent on his face. He's getting tired of this constant verbal battering. He's not the kind of guy who likes to fight with words. He prefers the contact of flesh against flesh but right now, he's so distraught about upsetting Toshiro that he doesn't have the flare in him to beat up Ichigo, no matter how badly he wants to. Ichigo himself looks distracted. He's not heartless. He's proven that to Toshiro. But he can't help feel he should have been a bit more empathetic towards the poor boy. He sighs heavily.

'We shouldn't have done that to Toshiro,' he whispers and hangs his head low. Grimmjow uncurls fists and stares at the prince. Did he actually hear Prince Ichigo care about someone else other than himself?

'Dude, you ok?' he asks with concern.

'Of course I'm ok! Why wouldn't I be?' Ichigo say irritably, his hand on his hips.

'Well, 'cuz this is the first time I'm hearing you care about someone else other than yourself.' Ichigo's face turns scarlet again.

'I'm not as selfish as you think I am, Jaguerjack!' he says through gritted teeth. Grimmjow snorts.

'You expect me to believe that?' he laughs. 'You treat me like dirt as well, in case you haven't noticed!'

'How can I when you act in such an uncouth way!'

'If you took your prissy nose out of the air, you'll see I'm not the caveman you think I am!'

'Yeah! You're probably worse!'

'You're probably too much of a coward to actually step down from your high horse!'

'Ugh!' Ichigo cries out in frustration as he ruffles his hands through his hair, messing it up completely. He walks around in a circle while ranting at Grimmjow. 'Your fucking attitude can sometimes be so fucking…!'

He stops here as he screams out in anger again as he starts moving in an anti-clockwise direction now. Grimmjow just stares at him, his own anger boiling away at the surface.

'What?' he yells at Ichigo as he walks around in a circle before him. He crosses his arms across his chest. 'Fucking what? Annoying? Irritating?'

'No! So fucking sexy!' Ichigo snarls at him as he stops to glower at him. Grimmjow's anger flares up at that except this anger doesn't want to make him rip Ichigo to shreds.

'Oh yeah?' Grimmjow sneers at him. 'Well you got a fucking hot body, you bastard!'

'You make me so damn angry that I want to tear you to pieces so you'd scream my name!' Ichigo shouts in his face as he's now standing right in front of Grimmjow, their bodies almost touching.

'You can't tell me what to do!' Grimmjow yells right back at him and grabs him roughly by the collar. Ichigo doesn't stop glaring intently into his blue eyes.

'I can make anyone do anything!'

'Well, maybe someone should make _you_ obey _their _orders!'

'Like who?'

'Like me!'And with that, Grimmjow smashes his mouth against the prince's. Ichigo doesn't struggle to escape. Instead, he threads his fingers through the hair at the back of Grimmjow's head and pulls him closer, thrusting his tongue into the blue-haired boy's mouth. He uses his tongue to wrestle for control with the other's tongue as he grinds his thin body against the broad one. Grimmjow places his hand in the small of Ichigo's back and draws him closer so their bodies touched. They don't know how long they've stood in the street kissing furiously. Feeling the need to breath, they break apart, gasping hard. Grimmjow nibbles at Ichigo's lips before they part, leaving a trail of saliva to connect their mouths. Ichigo licks that away and brings Grimmjow down to his head so he can lick his lips teasingly. Grimmjow purrs pleasurably, his eyes closed. Suddenly, they pop open and he pulls away from Ichigo. He looks him up and down, as if horrified at what he's just done.

'Ichigo…'he murmurs.

'What is it, Grimmjow?' Ichigo flirts as he comes close to Grimmjow, pulling on his collar to draw him closer.

'Do you know what we've just _done_?'

'Tch. Is this your first time kissing a boy, Grimmjow? Don't worry. It was pretty decent but practice makes perfect. Ready for another go?'

'Yes. I mean no! I mean...' He wants to pull away but Ichigo's touch just feels so good. The feather touches, the lust-filled brown eyes, the seductive smile and that warm and lean body grinding against his. He moans as Ichigo moves his body up and down his own. 'Nnnh! Ichigo! It's me! Grimmjow! Do you want to be seen with a guy like me? What about your reputation?'

Ichigo's eyes widen in realization and he jumps away from Grimmjow as if he's found out he has a disease.

'What the hell am I doing?' he cries out in fear and wipes his hands on his clothes as if to rid himself of imaginary germs. Grimmjow rolls his eyes.

'Nice to see the enthusiasm,' he says sarcastically. 'Now, can we concentrate? I can't believe we just did that!'

'You? I can't believe _I_ just did that! What will people say? What will they think of me?'

'Well, we can't pretend what just happened didn't happen, ya know!'

'I know! But what can we do! It's not like we can continue doing what we're doing in front of _everyone_!'

'Wait, so you actually _want _to do it again?' Grimmjow says slowly, a grin spreading across his face. Ichigo goes red again. He's been blushing non-stop throughout their time together and Grimmjow just realized how cute he looks when he does. How come he never noticed that about him before?

'I didn't say that!'Ichigo squeaks and becomes startled by the nervousness in his voice. Clearing his throat, he continues in a deeper voice. 'I mean, we can't continue even if we wanted to do. Not like we want to. Well, _I _certainly don't want to and-!'

'Did I mention how cute you look when you're flustered?' Grimmjow smirks as he saunters up to Ichigo and brushes his hair away. Ichigo can't help a moan escaping his lips and he nuzzles his face into Grimmjow's hand. 'Screw your reputation, Ichigo. You need to let loose once in a while.'

He gives Ichigo a soft look and Ichigo gasps. He's never seen Grimmjow look so gentle and kind before. It's almost…sexy. Scratch that. It's fucking sexy. How come he never noticed this about him before? Grimmjow bends down and captures Ichigo's lips with his and this time, the kiss is less violent and more tender. Ichigo kisses him back with the same gentleness and throws his arms around his neck while Grimmjow wraps his around his waist, lifting him up a bit. When they pull apart, Ichigo rests his head against Grimmjow's chest.

'Maybe we can do this after all,' Ichigo murmurs as Grimmjow strokes his head.

'Without anyone finding out,' Grimmjow adds.

'Until we're ready,' Ichigo finishes and looks up to smile shyly at his new lover. Grimmjow returns the smile and kisses him again.


	17. Done Or Am I?

'Later guys,' Toshiro mutters as he escorts Momo and Izuru out his front door. 'And thanks for coming over.'

'We're here for you, Shiro-chan,' Momo says gently as she hugs him and kisses him on the cheek. He hugs her tightly. He's never seen Momo as more than a sister and time and time again, she's proven that too him. He sometimes wishes he could help her as she's helped him battle with the hardships of his life; his parent's death, Karin and now this.

He would've spent the entire day with a dark cloud over his head if Momo and Izuru hadn't shown up, demanding to know the reason for his absence from school. It took him forever to narrate the events of yesterday as well as this morning. They both listened intently and reacted at the right moments perfectly. When he told them about what Karin had said, Momo had smacked the bed she was sitting cross-legged on in anger and muttered, 'That little whore.' They gasped when he told them about what he did with Gin (Toshiro couldn't help blushing) and gaped at him when he told them about the bar.

'You _drink_?' Momo had said in disbelief. Toshiro shifted uncomfortably in his place and concentrated on looking at his feet.

'You're in love with _Gin_?' Izuru had uttered with his mouth open. 'How come you never told us this?' After all, he tells Toshiro everything.

'There are…some things I don't think you two can ever understand about me,' he had said softly.

'How can we if you don't even bother telling us?' Momo had cried out. 'If you can't tell us, who else can you tell, Shiro-chan?'

'You can't keep it all to yourself forever,' Izuru had said kindly. 'One day, you're going to break down.'

'I think that happened this morning,' he had said dully and then told them what had happened this morning. If they had been shocked before, they never saw this coming.

'Those mother-fucking sons of bitches,' Momo had said incredulously as she had jumped off the bed to hug Toshiro tightly. Toshiro had wanted to hug her back but he just felt so hollow and empty inside. Izuru had looked at his hands in his lap before getting up and joined them for a group hug. Toshiro began to feel a little better knowing he had friends like them and hugged them both back.

'So what'll it be, Tosh?' Izuru had exclaimed. 'Graffitti their property or egg their houses? Or we could just egg them, we're not picky.'

'As fun as that sounds,' Toshiro had said with a roll of his eyes. 'I can't be bothered with them. They've had their fun and now, I just don't want anything to do with them. They can just, get run over by a car for all I care. I am _done_.'

'Good,' Momo had said proudly. ''Cuz we're going to hook you up with someone out of this world! You know Isane right? I know she's a _little_ tall for you but she's _really_ nice, a little shy but you'll soon warm up to her and-!'

'No, Momo,' Toshiro had then said in a tired voice. He had then collapsed on his bed between them. 'As in I'm done with love. It's too complicated. It's why I gave up on it in the first place after Karin. I don't know what came over me to chase a guy like Gin. I mean, can you _see_ me with him? He's right. Even if we did do it, it's not right. It can't ever be. So no more. I don't want any more heartbreak. Not for myself and not for anyone else.'

'You can't be serious, Toshiro,' Izuru had said, shocked at his best friend's decision. 'You can't be done with love just because of one guy…'

'He's not just any guy, Izuru!' Toshiro had cried out and sprung off the bed to face the two of them with pain on his face. 'Before him, I wouldn't _dare_ think about falling for _anyone_ let alone a guy! And then he came. And my world just changed. I know this is corny, but I guess he completes me. Like a part of me had been missing and he had just filled it in with himself. You guys, I think-no! I _know _that I'm in love with him!'

His voice had then started to sound strangled and tears had started to pour thick and fast from his tear ducts. He can't remember the last time he had cried in front of anyone. But he doesn't care about his reputation. He'd just bared his soul and was so overwhelmed with emotion he hadn't noticed Momo pull him back on the bed and place his head in her lap as she had stroked his hair lovingly while whispering soothing words to him. He had sniffled like a baby and had tried to calm down.

'Remember that poem, Momo?' he had croaked after finding his voice again.

'Mm-hmm,' she had acknowledged.

'That wasn't the last one,' he had said feebly and had gotten up to fetch his folder to fan out the poems he had been getting. Her eyes had widened as she had read each and every one of them carefully and slowly. Once she had finished, she had looked at him, her eyes filled with tears.

'Oh, Toshiro!' she had burst out and had grabbed him in a tight hug around his neck, blocking his air passage.

'Hinamori!' Izuru had said uneasily as he had tried to pry her grip loose. 'You're choking him!'

'How come you never told me!' she had demanded shrilly once she had released him.

'I told Izuru…'

'And you _both _kept this from me? You sexist pigs! Just because I'm a girl doesn't mean I won't understand what's going on! And it's poetry! You know how I love poetry!'

'Calm down, Hinamori!' Izuru had said hastily. 'It's just…we weren't sure who it was and Toshiro had no choice but to ask me since half my literature class writes poetry! And that includes the guys!'

'Wait…Toshiro, don't tell me you thought it was a _guy_?' She had turned on him with a beady eye. 'And not just any guy but maybe, oh I don't know, _Gin_?'

'Wellll….'

'Toshiro! No wonder you were so intent on chasing him! Alright, look at me. Look at me! Now repeat after me, I do not love Gin Ichimaru. I thought he loved me hence I developed feelings for him.'

'Momo…'

'Just do it!'

'Alright, alright! I do not love Gin Ichimaru. I thought he loved me hence I developed feelings for him. Happy? Now what do you want me to do? Burn the poems or something?'

'Are you mad?' She had gathered the poems in her hands and stuffed them in her pockets. 'I'm keeping them! No way am I going to leave them with you! You don't know how to appreciate them!'

Toshiro had rolled her eyes while Izuru had laughed. He grins at his friends. He can't believe he has such amazing friends like Momo and Izuru who will always be there for him no matter what and who he can tell anything. Well, almost anything. He hasn't told them how he had told Gin that he loves him or the fact that he suspects Grimmjow to be his mystery poet. He wants to confront Grimmjow himself about this. It's his problem and he didn't want to get them involved. Momo was already plotting on getting revenge on them like she had forgotten her love for the prince already. That's Momo for you. She'll abandon everything to help her closest friends. It's why he loves her so much.

'It's getting late,' Izuru had then said as he had glanced at his wrist watch and the three of them had walked down to the door, with Izuru and Toshiro making fun of her love for Prince Ichigo.

'Remember, Shiro-chan,' Momo now says and looks him hard into his eyes. 'We're just a phone call away. So whenever you need us, just give us a ring and we'll be there. Got that?'

'Yeah. I got it.'

'And don't down a glass of rat poison!' Izuru calls as they round the corner. 'I've heard it's bad for the skin! Gives acne!'

Toshiro laughs as they disappear. He sighs happily and leans against pole on his porch, staring up into the heavens. The stars are out and are sparkling like polished diamonds. The night air is thick with the sweet smell of oak trees that line the opposite side of the street and the grass is glistening with beads of dew. Chirping crickets complete the tranquility of the picture. Toshiro inhales deeply. He's finally at peace with himself. The storm is calming down at last. Or is it?

He glances at Rangiku's house and freezes. Panicking, he ducks down to hide, his heart pounding.

'What's he doing here?' he thinks frantically and peeks from his hiding place just to make sure his eyes aren't deceiving him. Unfortunately, they aren't. Gin Ichimaru is standing solidly in front of Rangiku's house, chatting rapidly with her. His face seems to show he's worried about something for he isn't smiling. Rangiku says something and he shakes his head sadly. Finally, he waves goodbye, gets into his car and drives off. Toshiro slowly rises from where he had been crouching, staring in utter disbelief at Gin's car as he drives off.

'Hey, Toshiro!' Rangiku calls as she spots him and waves him over. Still stunned, he approaches the fence separating their lawns.

'Rangiku, how do you know him?' he stammers, still staring at the horizon where Gin's car had disappeared from.

'Who? Gin? Oh, he's a friend of mine. We go way back. Said he had something troubling him and he wanted to talk about it. Do you know him?'

'He…teaches at my school…'

'No wonder. He's having trouble with this one particular student he admires. Says he's never met a boy like him before. But the problem is, the boy has a crush on him. Well, more like an infatuation. Gin doesn't want to distract him from his studies but this boy is too obsessed with him and that worries Gin.'

'Oh.' Toshiro looks away from Rangiku, hoping she didn't notice the blush creeping up his face.

'Toshiro…'

'What?'

'I know it's you.'

'How did you figure that out? I mean, what makes you say that?'

Rangiku laughs at the horror Toshiro is experiencing and she pats him on his head. He huffs grumpily. He hates it when she does that. It makes him feel like a little boy.

'Trust me, Toshiro. There's no boy as brilliant as you in Karakura High School and I immediately knew who Gin had been talking about when he said the boy is a genius.'

'He said that about me?' Toshiro is glowing in the inside but he scolds himself for feeling this way. He had just promised Momo that he would get over Gin!

'You shouldn't think he doesn't care about you, Toshiro. He does. A LOT.'

'He has a funny way of showing it.' He says this quite bitterly as he crosses his arms.

'Don't think badly about him. Gin's had his share of heartbreaks. Horrible ones. I had to pick up the pieces. I was the one who suggested he came here to teach to get away from it all.'

'So much for getting away from it all.'

'It's not your fault, Toshiro.'

'Not my fault? Rangiku, did he even _tell_ you what I did to him yesterday?'

'If I remember correctly, you came on quite strongly and he didn't know what to do. Relax, Toshiro! He isn't angry or upset! He's just sad that he has to be the one to break your heart. If there's one thing he understands, it's getting dumped by the person you truly care about.'

Toshiro clamps his mouth shut and stares off into space as he contemplates on what Rangiku has just said. Well, at Gin doesn't hate him for what he's done. But then, the bond between them as student and teacher has been broken and it can never go back to the way it was, not even as friends.

'If I hadn't acted so stupidly, we wouldn't be in this mess,' he mutters angrily under his breath. Rangiku sighs and leans on the fence so she is level with Toshiro now.

'Look, Mr. Moody,' she exclaims matter-of-factly. 'We do the stupidest things when we love somebody. And sometimes, it ruins things and hurts you more than any pain can ever do. But it shouldn't stop us except make us try harder. The kind of love you have to struggle for is the one that's worth the trouble.' Rangiku nudges him. 'Gin's just confused but I know that look in his eyes when he meets someone he cares about strongly. So go get him, tiger. Rock his world. He needs a guy like you.'

Toshiro gapes at her while she says all this. Rangiku raises her eyebrow at him.

'Well? What are you waiting for? Go get your beauty sleep, Romeo! You're going to need it to sweep Juliet off of her feet tomorrow!' she scolds him and shoos him away as she herself makes her way back to her house. He shakes his head as she slams the screen door of her house shut. Rangiku can be the craziest woman he's ever met but even she has her moments of wisdom. He just hopes he knows what he's doing by listening to her.


	18. The Moment Of Truth

He skipped Gin's class the next day. Call him a coward, but it's not easy facing the person who you declared your undying love to and not have them return the affection. And declaring it while drunk on top of that. That factor didn't help encourage him to face Gin today either.

Toshiro takes a deep breath and watches as his classmates file into Gin's class. Momo and Izuru stand outside the class and look around for him. Momo looks both ways as Izuru stands awkwardly and bites his nails in anxiety. He does that whenever he's worried about something. Toshiro hides behind a wall as they look in his direction. He doesn't want them to spot him. He didn't want them to know that he was going to face Gin and clear the air between them but not the way they had decided last night. He was going to march up to Gin and tell him that he loves him and there is nothing he can do to change that. He had spent the entire night lying awake on his back in bed, thinking of what to say to Gin and how to approach him without passing out. Every time he tried to fall asleep, Gin's face would loom in his mind all worried and Toshiro would wake up in a sweat. This is going to be harder than he thought and he can't take this lightly.

Once Momo and Izuru finally file into the class, Toshiro lets out the breath he had been holding and slumps to the floor, his head turned to the left as he stares into space, his mind in a whirl. What is he doing? Does he really think he can just go up to Gin and tell him how he feels? He was drunk _that_ time so blurting things out had been easy. But this time it's different. This time he's sober and has sweaty palms. He never gets sweaty palms. Karin never gave him sweaty palms either. God! Why the hell is he so damn nervous! Well, maybe because he's about to show his vulnerable side to the man he loves so strongly and he's afraid of being rejected.

Well he can't do it right now. Gin's in class right now and Toshiro doesn't think he has the guts to sit in his class to watch Gin ignore him. It would just tear him up on the inside. After hearing about him from Rangiku, he realizes that Gin is just as bruised by love as he is. And more than anything, he doesn't want to hurt him anymore than he doesn't want to hurt himself in the process. He groans as he uses his fingers to massage his temples. This is so fucking complicated! Anything he does will either hurt him or Gin! He loosens the collar of his shirt. He needs to get away from here and get some air.

He springs to his feet and begins to walk quickly towards the quickest exit. It's a good thing that all the students are in class, leaving the corridors empty and clear for him to find his way easily. He rounds a sharp corner and reaches the glass doors to the outside. He's about to push the door open when he glances at his reflection in the door. His face is wrought with stress and anxiety while his hair is messy and his eyes look like he hasn't slept in days. He chuckles. He's looks like such a wreck he's surprised nobody had said anything to him. Well he had been so distracted about what to say to Gin he didn't have time to fix his appearance. As he tries to comb a few stray strands form his forehead, his eye catches something else in the reflection of the glass door. It's not so clear but Toshiro can distinctly make out the two figures in the transparent image. He swivels around and almost passes out right there and then.

There's a corner in the side of the corridor that is almost completely camouflaged by a wall and a tall money plant. It's usually the corner people don't even take notice of, not even when they are standing right next to it. But right now, it's hard for Toshiro to miss what with the two figures making out behind the plant and these aren't just any two people.

Grimmjow is hunching over Ichigo's slim body which is trapped between his body and the wall. Their lips are locked in a passionate kiss as Grimmjow has placed both his hands on either side of Ichigo's head. Ichigo gasps as their lips part and Grimmjow's mouth moves down to suck on his neck. Ichigo groans in pleasure and threads his fingers through his blue locks, arching his body towards Grimmjow. Grimmjow moans into his neck and uses one hand to lift Ichigo's leg up to wrap it around his waist.

Toshiro just stares at them for a minute before spinning away, looking at the reflection in the door and then turning back to look at them, his mouth partly open as if to say something. Their moans reach a new pitch that makes Toshiro blush while watching them. He wants to say something but he doesn't want to be rude and interrupt them. He smacks his forehead. He doesn't want to _interrupt_ them? They are practically having sex in the middle of the school and he's scared of being rude? He heaves a sigh and fixes them with a stern look. This is seriously getting ridiculous. He clears his throat loudly. Ichigo just moans even more loudly as Grimmjow grinds his body against his. Toshiro frowns. Well this isn't working!

'Tch! I don't think sex is permitted in the halls, you guys!' he calls out to them. The sound of his voice seem to snap them out of their trance as Ichigo's eyes fly open and spot him. He quickly pushes Grimmjow away and straightens his shirt, his face turning a rosy red.

'What was that about? It was just getting good!' Grimmjow snarls and Ichigo turns his face with his hand in Toshiro's direction, who is looking at them through bored eyes and is tapping his foot impatiently on the floor, arms akimbo. Grimmjow stammers slightly and glances at Ichigo before turning to look at Toshiro again.

'What're you looking at, pipsqueak?' he sneers, trying to look tough as he comes from out of the corner. Toshiro raises an eyebrow.

'Apparently you getting it on with the prince of Karakura High School,' he says coolly. He now slides a look at Ichigo, who is shifting uncomfortably in his place.

'Toshiro, this is not what this looks like,' Ichigo tries to explain but then stops as he tries to come up with a reason.

'I'm waiting, Ichigo.'

'Well…you see…we left your place…and well…you see…we were…arguing….and…Grimm! Help me out here!'

'Don't call me that in public!' Grimmjow snarls. He glares at Toshiro before mumbling something. Toshiro takes a step towards them.

'I'm sorry what?' Toshiro asks. To be honest, he's actually enjoying making the bully squirm. It feels nice to watch him struggle when he had always made him seethe with anger. But then, that was before he found out that this blue-haired guy had feelings for him and now, he's cramming his tongue down another guys throat. What gives here?

'We kinda….sorta….found out…that we…like each other…' Grimmjow says, barely audible. 'That's it.'

'That's it?' Toshiro says incredulously. 'You try to rape me in a bar, then show up at my doorstep and I find out that you had a bet with _this _guy (he jerks a thumb at Ichigo) to see who could win me over. And now, you're _making out_ with him? And you expect me to believe that _that's it_?'

'Toshiro,' Ichigo says soothingly as he steps away from behind the plant to join Grimmjow. 'I know you're probably mad but please try to understand that we both were heartbroken and devastated at what we had done to you. And during that process, we realized that we're crazy about each other. I never knew that Grimmjow is such a sensitive and amazing person. I've never met a guy like him before.'

'You really think so?' Grimmjow says softly, surprised at what the prince has to say about him. He puts his arm around Ichigo's waist and draws him to his body.

'I know so,' Ichigo cooes as he nuzzles his face in the nook of Grimmjow's neck.

'You're pretty cute yourself, Strawberry,' Grimmjow growls as he rests his head on top of Ichigo's. Toshiro clears his throat to get their attention. A sly smile spreads across his face.

'I'm not mad at you two,' he confesses. 'To be honest, I'm actually happy for you guys. I guess you find love in the most unexpected places between the most unexpected people. And if people like you can find love, it proves that love isn't so cruel. It makes sure that the right people fall for each other.'

'You'll find your soul mate, Toshiro!' Ichigo says enthusiastically as he runs his fingers up Grimmjow's chest. The bell rings. 'Oops! I gotta split, Grimm! Later!'

He blows him a kiss before disappearing in the crowd to find his gang. Grimmjow sighs and jams his hands in his pockets as he moves away too.

'Grimmjow, wait!' Toshiro calls. Grimmjow stops and pivots to face him. 'I know this is awkward but didn't you hate Ichigo before?'

'I guess I did,' he admits and then stares off in the direction Ichigo had disappeared in, smiling a little. 'But then, you shouldn't let hate stop you from moving on and seeing the true side of people.'

'I guess so,' Toshiro murmurs as he spots Karin. He needs to say a few words to her after this. 'One more thing!' He fishes out a notebook from his bag. 'I accidently took this from your house that day.'

Grimmjow's eyes widen as he grabs his notebook and runs a hand over its cover.

'I'd been looking for this! I write all my poems in here!' he says happily but then gives Toshiro a dark look. 'Please don't tell me you heard me say that!'

'Grimmjow, have you been using those poems for anything?' Toshiro asks, eagerness apparent in his tone thought he tried to stay calm. This could be it. The moment of truth. He's finally going to find out who is mystery admirer is.

'Ummm, not that I know of, Toshiro,' Grimmjow says and looks at him curiously. 'I don't like to show people my poems. You know, my image and all. And besides, these are incomplete. I can never complete my poems. Nasty habit of mine.'

'Oh.' Toshiro's shoulder slump in disappointment. He had really been hoping, well alright not _hoping_, but at least he could solve the mystery of the anonymous poems. He really thought he had a lead. Grimmjow continues giving him a concerned look.

'You alright, Toshiro?' he asks.

'Yea,' he murmurs and looks up to see Karin is nowhere in sight. He remembers he has something to say to her. 'I think I will be. Thanks, Grimmjow.'

'You're welcome. Wait. Thanks for what? Toshiro!'

But Toshiro is already sprinting down the hall, trying to locate Karin. He suddenly spots a bobbing head of black hair and dashes towards the person. The girl is walking down the stairs and the rate the crowd is moving, Toshiro will never reach her in time. He inhales deeply and begins pushing people aside frantically. He comes to the stairs but Karin is already at the bottom.

'Karin!' he shouts to her. She turns around and upon seeing Toshiro, her mouth falls open.

'T-Toshiro?' she stutters. Toshiro sits on the banister and slides down to her. He jumps off and lands right in front of, panting hard from having to run after her.

'Karin!' he exclaims. 'I forgive you!'

'What?' she states, dumbstruck.

'I'm still mad you,' he continues as his breath slowly comes back to him. 'But I can't be mad at you forever. I mean, it's not your fault! Well, ok it is a little but we all make mistakes and we're all not perfect! Neither is love! The craziest people fall in love with each other but then, that's how it works! Some people just aren't meant to be!'

'Toshiro, you've lost me…'

'What I'm trying to say is, Karin, is that we weren't meant to be and I can't spend the rest of my life blaming you for that. I need to move on so I can-!'

'Toshiro!' comes a new voice and Izuru comes hurtling towards him. 'Toshiro! I've been looking all over for you!'

'Not now, Izuru!' Toshiro snaps as he turns back to Karin to complete his sentence.

'But this is really important, Toshiro!' Izuru insists and tugs at his shirt. Toshiro pulls away.

'Maybe you should listen to what he has to say, Toshiro,' Karin says gently.

'I will,' he answers. 'But after I tell you that I don't hate you anymore and that it would be great if we became friends again and-!'

'Toshiro! It's about the poems!' Izuru whines and jumps up and down on the balls of his feet.

'That can wait, Izuru! Can't you see I'm busy!' Toshiro says through gritted teeth.

'I know who did it and it's been killing me not to tell you and I need to tell you now before I lose it!'

'Izuru! Calm down and wait! We'll talk about this after I'm done talking to Karin! Ok, Karin! Since we're now no longer enemies, well, to me we were but now we officially aren't so-!'

'I wrote those poems and sent them to you!' Izuru burst out.


	19. Isn't That Enough?

Izuru is shaking so hard, his feet are tapping to their own rhythm on the floor. At first, Izuru thought Toshiro hadn't heard him. Or maybe that he's going to pass out any minute. He has stopped talking to Karin and judging from the look on her face, Izuru could tell that Toshiro isn't exactly himself either. People around them have broken into a buzz of excited whispering.

'Poems? What poems?'

'He's been writing poems to Toshiro? His best friend?'

'I knew there was something up between them! They always acted a little too friendly with each other.'

'Maybe that's why things didn't work out between Hitsugaya and Karin.'

'Kira Izuru can write poems? How gay can you get?'

Toshiro turns around slowly to face his 'best friend'. Izuru braces himself for whatever Toshiro is planning to throw at him. He's hoping it's a punch. He wouldn't be able to bear it if Toshiro had an emotional breakdown. It would tear him up in the inside. But instead…

'Haha! Good one, Izuru!' Toshiro says pleasantly as he grins at Izuru. Izuru is stunned. What the hell...? 'It's a little joke, everyone!' Toshiro turns to the suspicious crowd. 'Tch! Can you _imagine_ Izuru writing poems to me?'

Slowly, the crowd begins to laugh and nudge each other about the 'joke'. Izuru and Karin look at Toshiro curiously, not sure of what he's up to. That's when Toshiro grabs Izuru arms and starts dragging him away from the crowd, maintaining a cheerful façade as he waves to the people. Izuru follows him, confusion on his face. He looks back to Karin who just shrugs her shoulders. Once they round the corner, they pick up speed and Toshiro has tightened his grip on Izuru's wrist. The pressure makes Izuru's wrist ache as he stumbles while he walks but Toshiro doesn't stop in his stride. Now, fear is slowly building up inside Izuru. Of course Toshiro is not alright but he isn't stupid enough to make a scene in front of the entire school. He needed to cover things up before he got down to confronting Izuru properly. And that is what Izuru is afraid of. Sure enough, once they enter the back garden of the school, which is almost always empty, Toshiro flings Izuru forward.

Izuru nearly falls flat on his face but he regains his balance and turns back to face Toshiro to be met with a punch on the side of his jaw. He feels like it's been dislocated as his head snaps to the side. Blood floods his mouth as the pain shoots up his face. He winces in pain as he lays a hand on the throbbing spot and slowly turns to face Toshiro again. Toshiro isn't red. He isn't fuming with anger. But he is as white as a sheet and has his hand curled into a fist as if ready to hit him again. Izuru flinches. Toshiro laughs harshly.

'My best friend,' he croaks as if he had been crying and he looks down at his fist which he had used to punch Izuru. 'I should have seen this coming. How could I have been so blind?'

'Toshiro, I can explain myself,' Izuru whispers soothingly as he takes a step towards him but Toshiro takes a step away, his eyes now locked on him. His teal eyes show nothing but hurt and hate and the two combined in the poor boy before Izuru almost made him cry at that point.

'I told you _everything_, Izuru,' Toshiro says bitterly. 'I told you about the poems, I told you about Grimmjow, I told you about Ichigo, I just fucking told you about my feelings for Gin. So why the fuck did you have to come and tell me that you sent me those poems? What? Did you expect me to magically understand and say everything is alright?'

'N-no! You got it all wrong-!' Izuru babbles.

'Or did you expect me to forget about loving Gin and take my chances with you? Is that why you sent those poems? You thought you could win me over that way?'

'Toshiro! It's not like that!'

'You know what? You're just like everybody else! You never cared about me! You just like to see me suffer! That's why you told me you sent the poems! You don't want me to be with Gin! You just want me to yourself!'

'That's not why I told you! Toshiro, I-I never knew how much you loved Gin! I just…I just want you to be happy!'

'So telling me that _you_ wrote those poems is going to make me happy? That I should just forget the meaning behind those poems and pretend it never happened?'

'That's…That's not what I meant…'

'Then what do you mean! God, Izuru! What the fuck does _anyone_ mean when they say 'I love you' to a person? Do they say it just because they want to? Or do they just like hurting someone for the heck of it because it is so _fucking_ entertaining to watch someone-!'

'I _do_ love you, Toshiro! Don't say stupid things like that!' Izuru cries out as he launches himself at Toshiro and pulls him into a tight hug, crying his eyes out on his shoulder. Toshiro is too stunned to move or even push him away.

'I couldn't, I just couldn't,' Izuru sobs as his shoulders shake. Toshiro wants to hug him back but he controls himself. He hasn't exactly forgiven Izuru and he isn't planning to. Izuru sniffles. 'I just couldn't stand it any longer. I started loving you the minute we became friends. You looked out for me. You helped me. You'd comfort me when I'd be in pain. I-I couldn't keep hiding my feelings for you forever. So I sent poems. I liked seeing you smile when you read them and when you'd tell me how you liked them. It felt…_wonderful_ to know you at least acknowledged my existence.'

'What do you mean? How can I not acknowledge your existence, Izuru? You're my fucking best friend.'

'That's just it. Because I'm your best friend, you'll never see me as anything more than that. I didn't want to be your best friend forever, Toshiro. When you were with Karin, I thought I could get over you but I couldn't and it got worse after you two broke up. I was…I was going to come clean on your parent's death anniversary but you didn't come to school. And the next day, when Momo and I came to your house, you tell us that you love Gin. How do you think I felt, Toshiro? The very reason for my existence is in love with someone and it's not me.'

Toshiro finally realizes what Izuru is trying to say. He bites his lower lip to hold back the tears starting to well up in his own eyes. Izuru had been in love with him since forever and now, he finds out he's in love with another guy. He's been trying so hard to win him over and he failed. He's hurting. He's hurting as much as Toshiro is at the moment. Coming clean is probably the only way he can feel better but Toshiro is just making it worse. God! He is such a bastard right now!

'Izuru, I need to ask you something and it's important.' Toshiro practically chokes on his words as he utters them. 'Do you still love me?'

Izuru sniffles a bit more and hugs Toshiro even more tightly.

'I know I shouldn't,' he murmurs softly. 'But I can't help myself. I don't think I'll ever be able to get over you, Toshiro, and it scares me.'

Toshiro sighs and finally raise his arms to drape them around his best friend. Izuru gasps at his touch.

'I know it's going to be hard,' he says gently into Izuru's ear. 'And I don't want to hurt you, Izuru. You _know_ you mean more to me than anything in the world. And I love you too.'

'But not the way I do,' Izuru utters and holds onto him dearly. Toshiro gently pulls Izuru's arms away from himself to look Izuru in the eyes. Those eyes are now filled with sadness. 'You'll never love me as more than a friend.'

'But isn't that enough?' he says helplessly. 'Izuru, no matter how many times I hook up with _anyone_, you know you'll be the first person I'll tell, the first person I'll come to for advice. I don't want us to go out because…that would mean things would change between us and, Izuru, I don't want that! I like us the way we are. Please try to understand. Please?'

Izuru is mesmerized by those beautiful teal eyes. They speak volumes for their owner. Izuru can literally drown in them. Right now, they are pouring with anguish and emotion, as if pleading him to understand. Understand that, Toshiro doesn't want to lose him. That he's afraid and he needs Izuru more than anything right now. Izuru takes a deep breath and a watery smile spreads across his face.

'I understand, Toshiro,' he says simply. 'I wouldn't change what we have for the world. Because it means more to me than my own life. You're my best friend, Toshiro. And that's enough.'

'Izuru!' Toshiro utters and throws himself at Izuru again, hugging fiercely. Izuru laughs out loud and pats him on the back.

'Come on, Tosh!' he says merrily. 'You're acting like you've already gotten the man of your dreams. And by the way, screw what Momo said. I say you go tell Gin you love him and win him over!'

'I kinda already did!' Toshiro narrates the rest of the drunken night to him. Izuru's eyes widen. It's his turn to punch him playfully on the shoulder.

'And I thought I was doing a stupid thing by telling you I love you!' he jokes.

'Yea, well, I don't think I have a shot at winning Gin over now,' Toshiro says bitterly as he ruffles his already messy hair. 'So might as well forget it.'

'Are you shitting me? I just came clean so you can get together with Gin and now you tell me you don't want to? What the fuck is wrong with you!'

'Wow! Izuru! You're cursing! You must be serious!'

'Hell yeah I'm serious! You're not going anywhere but to Gin's office!'

'Izuru! Don't-!'

But Izuru is already pushing him in the direction of the offices.

'Izuru! What if…what if he rejects me _again_?'

'Well, you'll never know unless you try!'

'But, Izuru!' Toshiro squirms away from him and wheel around to face him, a scared look plastered across his face. 'I-I don't think I can handle any more heartbreak. I don't…I don't think I'm…strong enough anymore…'

Izuru raises an eyebrow.

'Toshiro, you're the strongest person I have _ever_ known,' he says confidently. 'You've dealt with all kinds of hardships all your life and what doesn't kill you only makes you stronger. Right now, there's a guy behind that door who would be lucky to have a guy like you and if he can't appreciate you, then damn he doesn't deserve you! Now get out there and show him what he's missing out on!'

Toshiro squares his shoulders and faces the doors along the hall. Behind one of them is Gin, just waiting for him. It's now or never. No going back now. He's going to do it.

'Just one thing, Izuru!' Toshiro says boldly. 'Don't tell Momo I said you mean more to me than anything in the world. She'd skin me alive.'

'You're secret's safe with me!' Izuru laughs and salutes him. Nodding to him, Toshiro marches off down the corridor. There goes one brave soldier!


	20. Hurting Me Hurting You

_**Hi everyone! So, the end is near () but I just want to say thanks for the reviews and trust me, if it weren't for you guys, I don't think I would have been able to finish this story! Plus, this story has mostly been altered due to you guys cuz judging from your comments, I wanted to do justice and make everyone end up with the right person^^**_

_**So kick back, relax and enjoy the rest of the story! Arigato!**_

Toshiro can't believe he has sweaty palms again! He wipes them hastily on his jeans and turns around. Izuru is gone now and that just quickens his heartbeat. He's all alone except for the most amazing man behind the door before him. He glances at his wristwatch. It wouldn't surprise Gin if Toshiro barged into his office right now. After all, it is time for their extra class after school. Which meant that there's nobody left in school save for the two of them. He gulps. That's just scary.

He slowly inhales and then exhales. He taps lightly on the door.

'Come in,' comes a barely audible voice which causes Toshiro's entire body to be attacked by pins and needles. He can feel the blood pounding in his ears as he pushes the door open. Everything seems to be going in slow motion for him. The door is going too slowly, he's walking like he's underwater and Gin is taking forever to look up to see the intruder. His face is blank and Toshiro expects some reaction. Any reaction. Instead, Gin looks back down at his desk to stuff paper into a folder. He then turns away from Toshiro and places the file up on a shelf beside the purple couch.

'I suppose I should have told you beforehand but I've cancelled our extra classes starting today, Hitsugaya-kun,' Gin says rather coldly and Toshiro reels back as if literally stung by the comment. 'So you are free to go home.'

Toshiro can't believe his ears. Is Gin actually saying what he thought he said? Worse, is he actually serious about what he had said? Toshiro stares at Gin with his mouth open while still standing in the doorway, completely still. Gin shifts his head slightly in his direction before returning to busying himself with the numerous folders on his desk.

'You need to get out more, Toshiro,' he says casually, still refusing to look at the boy. 'You're mathematics skills are impressive but it won't help you make friends. I've been stopping you from doing that hence, I permit you to leave and enjoy yourself.'

'What if I don't want to leave?' Toshiro says before he can stop himself. He's gripping the doorknob with such force his knuckles are going white. He's fixed Gin with such an intense share that, though Gin isn't looking at him, he can feel it and it is making him uneasy.

'Then I am ordering you, as your teacher, to leave my office. Do what you want once you leave,' Gin says, all gentleness gone from his voice. Toshiro takes a sharp intake of breath when he hears the tone. He laughs hollowly.

'I think we've past the 'teacher-student' barrier after that day,' he says quietly as he shuts the door behind him. At the sound of the door closing, Gin accidently looks up and Toshiro holds his gaze, refusing to let him look away.

'I don't suppose I can argue with you on that,' Gin says bitterly as he slams a folder down hard on the desk. Toshiro winces at the sound and suddenly, in the blink of an eye, Gin is towering over him. He gasps and presses himself against the door behind him. Gin moves in closer, bracing his hands on either side of Toshiro's head. Toshiro licks his lips nervously.

'I-I came here to say something,' he says feebly and realizes how weak he sounds. Gin raises an eyebrow and opens one eye to reveal a blood-red iris. Toshiro has seen it before but even now, it makes a chill run up his spine.

'No shit, Sherlock,' Gin says sarcastically and Toshiro can't help feel that he is toying with him. He tries swallowing but a lump has formed in his throat and he feels like he can't breathe. He just stares up at Gin, gaping like a fish. Gin sighs and moves away. 'Well, if you have nothing to say, I suggest you leave.'

'I don't care,' Toshiro blurts out. Gin turns around, his hair swishing over his face beautifully and settling like strands of fine silver on his forehead.

'Sorry?' he says, perplexed.

'I mean, I don't care that it isn't right,' Toshiro says more clearly, his voice rising with confidence as he moves away from the door. 'I don't care if people think it's wrong. I don't care if they call me a freak. If loving you makes me a freak, then it's worth it. Because you're worth it, Gin. You're worth so much too me I could-!'

'Stop, Toshiro,' Gin says softly and holds up a hand. Toshiro reluctantly closes his mouth and focuses on his love's face. He's surprised to see it is twisted in confusion and…is that fright? Toshiro blinks rapidly. What could Gin possibly be afraid of?

'I don't think…I can do this, Toshiro,' he says in anguish, clutching his hand over chest right where his heart is. 'Can you imagine what people will say? Not about you, but about me? 'There's goes Gin Ichimaru. Did you know he had an affair with one of his students? Shocking, isn't it?' I'll lose my job. I'll lose my home. I'll lose my friends. Did you ever think…what would happen to me if we did do it?'

Maybe it's the play of the light but Toshiro can swear he can see drops of water streaming down Gin's face. He's crying. Toshiro is so overwhelmed that he feels like crying as well.

'Gin! Please! Don't!' Toshiro pleads.

'Don't what, Toshiro?'

'Think that love is such a burden. I know it is. I'm not so young to not know how harsh it can be! But then I met you, Gin. I met you and all of a sudden, love isn't as cruel as I thought. It's…'

'Crueler,' Gin says abruptly and is now right in Toshiro's face again. He's literally shaking with emotion and that is frightening Toshiro. He wants to back away from this man but the feeling of being so close to him and so close to knowing his secrets stops him from running away. Then, without warning, Gin grabs Toshiro by his upper arms and almost lifts him off the ground. Toshiro lets out a helpless cry.

'You can't realize how cruel love is being to me right now, Toshiro,' Gin chokes out and Toshiro whimpers. 'It's waving you in front of me, taunting me to come get you and leave everything else behind. It's making me choose between my new peaceful life and you and you cannot imagine how _hard_ this is for me. When I first met you, I knew you were special. When we had our classes, I knew there was something different about you that set you apart from everyone else. I soon began to crave your company. I looked forward to our extra classes, to be alone with you and to get to know you. You were such a trouble child I just wanted to help you. And then that day…' He gulps and drives his nails into Toshiro's skin, making him bite his tongue to hold in a cry of pain. 'That day, on the couch, if I hadn't controlled myself, I don't know what I would have done to you. I thought…that if I pursued you, I wouldn't just be ruining myself, I'd be ruining you. I'd be destroying your already deteriorating world even further and I just couldn't do that. It's not because I didn't love you; it's because I love you so much I can't bear to see you suffer. Toshiro, I love you too much to hurt you.'

'So what are you doing right now?' Toshiro utters, his eyes glistening with tears. 'You're hurting me, Gin, by telling me that you don't love me. You're hurting me by pushing me away. Don't you think you've hurt me enough?'

'Don't say that, Toshiro,' Gin says softly. His face is now only a few inches away from Toshiro's.

'Then stop pretending,' Toshiro whispers and kisses Gin tenderly on the lips. Gin doesn't react. He's just stunned at Toshiro's words. Is it true? He's been hurting his little Toshiro? No, never. He'd never hurt him! He doesn't want him to fall for him! It will only increase his pain…

Toshiro leans forward for another kiss. Gin's reins his head back and pushes Toshiro away but accidently puts in too much force. Toshiro stumbles backwards, bashing his wrist into the desk behind him. He cries out in pain and crumbles to floor, grasping his throbbing wrist tightly. Realizing what he has done, Gin stares in horror at Toshiro lying there on the floor, biting his lower lip till blood rises to stop himself from howling in pain. What has he done?

'Let me see that,' Gin says calmly, though his insides are rattling in fear and guilt. At first, Toshiro flinches when he scoots towards him but then relaxes when Gin rests a hand on his rigged shoulder. He slackens it and moves his hurting wrist into Gin's other slender hand. The beautifully smooth skin is slowly turning purple and is swelling slightly. Gin squeezes it gently and earns a shout from the poor boy.

'Hush, little one,' he murmurs soothingly as he uses his free hand to lift Toshiro to his feet. 'I need to take you to the sick ward.'

'Isn't it closed right now?' Toshiro queries, though the pain is evident in his tone. His wrist is hurting him badly. Gin pulls the door open and guides him out.

'The doctor has left but the janitor won't close it until much later,' Gin whispers as they move away from the offices. 'Don't worry, Toshiro. I'll bandage it up for you. It's the least I can do.'


	21. Worth It In The End

Gin accidently lets his hand flit over Toshiro's bruised wrist. Toshiro hisses in pain and Gin glances at his face as he bends over his wrist while bandaging it. He returns to wrapping the fragile hand. It feels so nice and soft in his. He just wishes he can caress it forever with the boy tightly enclosed in his arms…

He shakes the thought from his head and pulls a little too tightly on the cloth as he winds it round. Toshiro cries out in pain again. He glares at Gin's head form above.

'Can you _at least_ be a little gentle?' he hisses angrily and tries to pull his hand away but Gin applies a gentle pressure to prevent him from withdrawing. The sick ward is tiny, with just a single desk and chair against one wall and a gurney against an adjacent wall with a curtain to give a sick person some privacy while sleeping. Gin has locked the door to stop anyone from finding out they are using the room without any permission. The room is painted an unusually bright white which is heightened due to the sunlight streaming out of the window behind the chair. It's midday and yet the sun is as sunny and cheerful as ever unlike the two people sitting sullenly in the compact room. Right now, Toshiro is perched on the gurney with Gin bending down on his knees as he winds a cloth bandage around Toshiro's wrist. Even though he's trying to help ease the pain, he isn't exactly doing such a good job of it.

He doesn't answer Toshiro's question but silently continues with his work. Toshiro sighs as he looks at his teachers head which bobs as he concentrates on not causing him any pain. He can understand why Gin is being so quiet and distant from Toshiro right now. After all, he had just bared his soul in declaring that he loves him back but can't because of the consequences. But doesn't he understand? The consequences shouldn't matter so much when you're in love! It's love that conquers it and makes it a petty con against the overwhelmingly powerful pro. Can't Gin see that? Can't he look into Toshiro's eyes and understand that? It's like he doesn't care about Toshiro at all. He's just so scared…

Toshiro hangs his head and can't help letting a sob escape his lips. That gets Gin's attention and he looks up in surprise to see Toshiro turning his head away quickly but not quick enough for Gin to catch a glimpse of his face. It's streaked with fresh tears. Gin's eyebrows come down to meet his eyes in a frown.

'Why do you cry, Toshiro-kun?' he asks and immediately regrets it as Toshiro lets out a choked sob. He's finished bandaging the wrist but hasn't let go and Toshiro hasn't pulled it away either. Gin tugs on Toshiro's other hand and Toshiro can't help but to force himself to look at him. Gin seems to be pleading him to be alright, to forget everything that has happened and to go back to the way things were before. It almost made Toshiro want to cry uncontrollably but he sustains himself. He can't break down. Not now.

'I think you already know why,' Toshiro murmurs as Gin places his hands on top of his while they lie on his knees. Gin encloses those petite hands in his and begins tracing circles in their palms with his fingers. Toshiro shivers at the ticklish feeling they are giving him.

'Even if I did, there is nothing I can do,' Gin answers gently as he now rubs the upper side of the hands, his hand sliding roughly over the bandaged wrist. Toshiro winces at the pain but Gin doesn't stop. It seems, Gin's having a hard time convincing himself that he should resist anymore. Toshiro presses on.

'On the contrary,' Toshiro says simply as he leans his head against the wall and looks up to the ceiling. 'Only you can stop my tears.'

He feels a weight shift onto his legs and he cries out in alarm. He looks down and finds his face uncomfortably in close proximity of Gin's. Gin moves his head to Toshiro's ear and breathes on it, causing goose bumps to rise up and down Toshiro's body. His hands are now planted on either side of Toshiro's thigh. Toshiro takes a sharp intake of breath.

'I've been thinking, Toshiro,' Gin breathes into his ear and the yearning in his tone sets Toshiro's face on fire.

'About what?' he can't help asking. Then, Gin kisses his temple and Toshiro jumps slightly. Did Gin just…?

'That maybe…' he pauses as he brushes his lips against where he had just kissed him.

'Maybe?' Gin is now tracing his lips along Toshiro's jaw and down to his neck, avoiding his lips.

'This…' He stops at his collarbone.

'This?' Gin runs a tongue over it and Toshiro shivers.

'Isn't so…' He kisses the jutting bone tenderly.

'Isn't so?' Toshiro balls his hands on his knees into fists.

'Bad,' Gin finishes as he brings his face level with Toshiro's. He's now completely in Toshiro's lap and Toshiro is afraid to even breathe for fear it might upset this beautiful moment. Gin then moves his hand to finger Toshiro's hurt wrist. 'I just hurt you. Not for the first time but the second. I just realized that I've been so selfish when it came to you. I was so wrapped up in keeping you at a distance and hiding my feelings, I didn't realize that I was hurting you instead of helping you. I hurt you physically…' he pauses to take a gasp of air as if the very memory hurt him. '…when I tried to shun your feelings for me. I'm such an….ass.'

He grits his teeth and hangs his head in shame.

'You can hate me now. I deserve it,' he says with a tone of finality. He's about to move away when Toshiro cups his face in his hands and raises it to meet his. Gin cracks his eyes open and holds his breath at the look of happiness and forgiveness on the boy's face, like Gin is his world. On the contrary, the boy is _his_ world.

'Now why would I want to do that when I love you so much?' Toshiro whispers and traces his fingers across Gin's parted lips. The lips then twist into a grin and plunge into a passionate kiss.

Toshiro hits his head against the wall but Gin cushions it with his hand as he coaxes the boy's mouth open so he can slip his tongue in. Toshiro allows him willingly and runs his fingers through Gin's hair. Gin then directs Toshiro to lie vertically on the gurney so he can crawl on top of him. Toshiro's body arches upwards to meet Gin's and the contact causes a spark of pleasure to coarse through him. He feels Gin moan into his lips. Gin rears his head back a little, gasping as he does and licks Toshiro's lips, savouring their taste. He plants kisses down to the point joining Toshiro's neck and shoulder. He nibbles there, causing a gasp to issue from Toshiro's lips. The sound excites Gin and he sinks his teeth in gently at first but then bites down harder. He sucks on his neck like a hungry vampire, driven by the mewling pouring out of his prey. He moves up to gently nip Toshiro's earlobe.

'Here,' he whispers hoarsely into his ear. 'I want to do it here. Now.'

Toshiro answers with another gasp of pleasure, grabbing Gin by his shirt and driving his body against Gin's. That's answer enough for Gin. He gently settles Toshiro's body back on the gurney, careful not to touch his hurt wrist. He draws Toshiro into a deep kiss as he straddles his waist while slowly undoing the buttons on his shirt. He pushes it back and marvels at the smoothness and youthfulness of his flawless skin. He runs his fingers down, tracing his collarbone, pinching his pink nipples, drawing circles around his belly button and finally stopping at his pants. Toshiro whines impatiently and Gin chuckles as he pats him on the cheek.

'Patience,' he murmurs to his love and plays with a lock of hair. 'I want to enjoy your body as much as I can.'

'Don't deny me yours then,' Toshiro mutters as he tugs at Gin's shirt and blushes. Gin laughs again as he pulls his shirt off hastily to appease the young boy. Now it's Toshiro's turn to admire the slim and beautiful body displayed to him. While he busies himself in feeling up Gin's torso, the man above him lifts him up to slip his pants off along with his boxers. The feeling of cold air hits his bare skin, causing Toshiro to inhale sharply.

'Have you ever done this before?' he asks uncertainly, clutching the sheets underneath him.

'You'd be surprised,' Gin smirks and taps his fingers to Toshiro's mouth. 'It's simple and hurts less once you get used to it. But it's my first time being on top. Just do as I say. Now suck.'

Toshiro obeys and coats the long digits in his saliva completely before Gin pulls it out to replace the free mouth with his own.

'Tell me if it hurts and I'll stop,' he murmurs into the kiss. Toshiro doesn't know what he means until he feels something wriggle into his tight entrance. He pulls away from the kiss and tries to get away from the eerie feeling of something inside him. Gin hushes him by pulling him closer and makes their chests touch. Toshiro grabs his shoulders to steady himself as a second finger enters him, moving in a scissor fashion. He wants to cry out in pain and tell Gin to stop but as he looks up, he sees the gentle and loving way Gin is looking at him and he forgets the pain.

'Gin loves me now, he really loves me,' he thinks to himself joyfully and bites on his lips as a third finger enters him.

'G-Gin!' he gasps and digs his nails into Gin's shoulder. The man doesn't flinch. He instead smoothes the hair on the boy's head in a soothing way.

'Just be patient,' he whispers again and wriggles his fingers inside until he hears moan and he stops. This moan is so lustful it can only mean he has found the boy's prostrate. The moan is so delectable and enticing; it causes Gin's erection to become hard. He glances at his face and notes the look of pleasure wrought on Toshiro's face. He quickly pulls his fingers out, causing a whine to escape the boy's mouth. He had his eyes closed but he cracks one open when Gin pulls his hand away. His breathing becomes slow and shallow now.

'Now what?' he says breathlessly but it seems he already knows what's next. Gin has already undressed himself and has positioned himself near the boy's entrance. Gin laughs softly.

'The best part,' he murmurs and pushes past the ring of muscle. Toshiro cries out in pain and grips Gin's shoulder even harder. His hips buck upwards but Gin holds them down with his hands. He runs his hands down his thighs to help calm him down and relax. Once the boy has relaxed his body, Gin pushes in even further, Toshiro's moans hitching higher with every push until he hits the spot. The moan escalates, causing Gin to almost release. He joins the moan with his own and slowly pulls out only to push back in. he's moving slowly but soon picks up speed.

'F-Faster, Gin…' Toshiro moans and his hands have travelled down from Gin's shoulders to his muscled arms. His fingernails dig into the flesh but Gin doesn't mind. He loves the feel of his small and delicate hands on his bare body. The bandages on his broken wrist run roughly along his arm and he grabs his gently, bringing it to his lips to kiss the injury.

'I'm sorry I ever hurt you, Toshiro,' he whispers and rams into Toshiro for like the fifth time. Toshiro's body moves with the rhythm and sweat is now forming on his body.

'Don't be,' Toshiro murmurs back and arches his head back as Gin hits his prostrate again. 'Because it was all worth it in the end.'

He can't believe he can still think. His body is so overwhelmed with desire and pleasure; it's only moving to please itself with no thought of letting Toshiro think logically. Gin nails his prostrate with every thrust and each thrust causing a thrill of pure pleasure to run up his body and cloud his mind. Both of them escalate into a high moan before Gin releases. Toshiro can feel something hot and viscous trickling down his hole and staining the bed sheets. Gin sighs in exhaustion and braces his hands on either side of Toshiro's head to stop himself from falling onto the boy. Toshiro is breathing heavily as he realizes what had just happened. He covers his face with the crook of his arm. For a minute, he thinks he's just had a dream. It can't be real. It just seemed too much like a fantasy right now…

Gin pulls his hand away and grins foxily at him. Toshiro smiles back weakly. No. it happened. It actually happened. And it sent his heart ablaze with passion and a thrill of happiness. He's finally found his love. Ichigo was right. He'll find his soul mate one day. It just coincidently happened to be today. Gin bends down to plant a kiss on his wet chest and then runs a sucks on the hickey he had made at the junction of Toshiro's neck and shoulder.

'How was that for a first time?' he says slyly.

'Not bad,' Toshiro smirks and tries to get up but Gin pushes him back down.

'That's all you have to say?' Gin pouts and grins as he kisses him playfully on the lips. 'Well then, I'll just have to keep going until it's the best you've ever had.'

Toshiro begins to protest but Gin covers his mouth with his hand and kisses his forehead. His smile widens.

'I love you, Toshiro,' he says fondly.

'I love you too, Gin,' Toshiro says, a thrill in his voice and he drapes his arms around his neck, clasping them together behind it. And Gin fucks him lovingly for the second time but slower this time so they both can enjoy the company and love of one another. At that moment, nothing else mattered.


	22. Epilogue: Love Is In The Air

_**So this is the last chapter people! I decided that happy endings are possible (though I don't believe in them, sorry) so this is going to be a happy ending for everyone! Ok, ok, ok! Its Valentine's Day and do not be surprised with the couplings here and there! Alright, enjoy! I had fun writing this for you guys! Oh! And the last chapter is form Toshiro's point of view^^**_

As the sun rises just over the horizon, its rays spread in all directions and one happens to sneak through my open window and bathe my face in it. I scrunch my eyebrows at the light disturbing my sleep and cover my face with my blanket. I'm about to roll over when something hard smacks me on my forehead. Whatever it was, it causes me to open my eyes and stumble out of bed, falling hard. Muttering curses under my breath, I rub my sore side and crawl back across my bed to squint out my window for the rude interrupter of my slumber. I'm greeted with another pebble (which I guess was what was flung at me before) but this time I duck and after avoiding a concussion, I look back out to glare at my attacker. Momo is grinning up at me, hands on her hips and Izuru besides her grinning just as widely.

'What the fuck was _that_ for?' I yell at her in anger, gripping my windowsill tightly to stop myself from falling out.

'Don't you know what day it is today, Toshiro?' Momo yells back. I maintain my annoyed expression as I rack my brain to figure out what Momo is getting at. I sneak a glance at my calendar and gasp.

'Shit! It's Valentine's Day! I promised Gin I'd meet him before my first class!' I panic and disappear from the window to dress myself for school. I can hear Izuru chuckle. In two minutes, I'm sprinting down the street to school with Momo and Izuru tailing behind me. I reach the school gates and wait for my two slowpokes for friends. Wheezing and gasping, Momo clutches the door handle and stops to catch her breath.

'Jeez, Toshiro! Now I know why you're in the school's track team,' she pants.

'He wouldn't have considered if Gin hadn't told him to,' Izuru teases and nudges me. I kick him and look left and right to make sure nobody had heard him.

True, Gin and I are together but we're going to take our time in telling everyone. Grimmjow and Ichigo were still taking their time in telling everyone but at least Ichigo's group knows that he's dating Grimmjow. They don't like him but they grudgingly accepted their leader's lover. But then again, it's not like Ichigo is going out with his teacher.

I look at my watch impatiently.

'He's late,' I say disappointedly. Students are starting to mill into school but they barely show any interest in the trio waiting outside the school doors. Except for…

'Momo!' Rukia squeals and launches herself at her lover. Momo cries out in surprise but then laughs and kisses Rukia swiftly on the lips. I smile weakly at her as Rukia produces a red rose for Momo who giggles and accepts it.

I guess it came as a surprise when Rukia asked Momo out in the beginning of January not only for Momo but for the rest of us too. We always thought Rukia _hated _Momo but it turned out it was just her way of trying to get Momo's attention. When Rukia had asked Momo out, Izuru and I thought she would reject her without hesitation. Rukia had asked Momo out right in front of us, for God's sake! Instead of laughing and saying no or maybe even insulting her, Momo had given a shy smile and accepted! She fucking accepted to go out with her rival of two years! Only later did she explain that she always liked Rukia which is why she always fought with her. Orihime had told her that Rukia liked her too so she was going to ask Momo out soon. She had just been waiting for her to do it! Well, how did you expect us to react? I just stared at her with my mouth open while Izuru had hugged and congratulated her on finding someone. Can't say I like Rukia but since it's for Momo, I made an effort to be nice to her. I'm still getting used to it and Rukia isn't as bad as I thought she was. But I still don't like her. Hard to forgive a person who shoved her ice cream on your head because she thought it would give you height. I'm just glad I got back at her with the rubber snake. Don't ask. That's another story.

'Momo!' Rukia coos and slips her arm through Momo's. 'Let's go and sit together before class starts, pleaaasssee? It's Valentine's Day and I want to spend as much time with you as possible! We can plan our day and how's we're going to celebrate it!'

'Weeellll…' Momo looks at me skeptically as if she thought I needed her to stay but her eyes are pleading me that she _really _wants to go with Rukia. I roll my eyes.

'Go ahead, Momo,' I grin and toss my head in the direction of the doors. They both squeal so piercingly I'm surprised the dogs haven't come bounding towards the school yet. As they scurry away, I sigh and lean again the door. Izuru does the same as he hitches his bag higher up his shoulder.

'Do you remember when school started, Izuru?' I murmur as I look at the sky. The sun is dancing merrily behind clouds shaped like fluffy animals and oddly twisted flowers. 'Can you imagine we'd be where we are now?'

'Don't know for sure, Tosh,' he whistles. 'But then again, everything happens for a reason and you know what, I wouldn't have wished it any other way.' He grins at me. 'We would never have found the people we love.' He glances sideways and I follow his gaze to grin broadly.

Grimmjow and Ichigo are having a full make-out scene in a hidden corner of the school and are literally crawling on top of each other. I swear, if I wasn't with Gin, I would have thought that those two were the most physical couple I have ever seen. Every chance they get, they go snogging in a corner and one time, I heard from Uryu that they had had sex in a bathroom stall. I'm no hypocrite. After all, Gin and I have done it in his office countless times. Who knew the couch is such a comfortable place to have sex! I have to stop thinking about it afterwards otherwise I want to go for another round. Trust me, Gin is _amazing_. I never knew my body could ever do things like that!

'Cue Ichigo's gang,' Izuru mutters and sure enough, his posse comes around the corner looking for their leader. 'And the two lovers break their session…' Ichigo and Grimmjow break apart and start rearranging their clothes back to normal. Ichigo smoothes his hair back. '…the prince joins his group and Grimmjow goes off in another direction.' I shake my head.

'You sure know people, Izuru,' I grin at him. He grins back but then looks in the direction of Ichigo's gang. At the same time, Uryu looks in their direction and raises a hand, a smile playing on his lips. I glance suspiciously at Izuru, who has a goofy grin on his own face and he waves his hand at Uryu. Uryu looks at them a bit before turning around to scramble after his group which is moving out of sight. Izuru sighs and his face is glowing. He turns to look at me and the light suddenly dims as he notes the sly grin I have.

'What?' he complains and starts blushing furiously.

'Nothing, nothing,' I smirk and glance at Uryu's retreating figure. 'I didn't know you had a thing for a certain someone.'

'If you must know,' Izuru says loudly. 'We just enjoy each other's company and there is nothing going on between us!'

'So how'd it happen?'

'We bumped into each other in the library and found out that we're both die-hard fans of Oscar Wilde and Elizabeth Browning!" Izuru gushes. 'Also, he likes chocolate, especially truffles, and he _adores _'Will and Grace' but Karen is a bit too cynical though Jack is _gorgeous_ and Will is-_What_? Why are you looking at me like that?'

I'm laughing hard now and clutch the door to stop myself from falling.

'Izuru! I'm not making fun of you!' I say heartily and clamp him on the back. 'I'm actually happy for you! I always knew you would find somebody.'

Izuru smiles at me strangely and then, without warning, he pulls me into a tight embrace. I cry out in surprise at first but then I relax and hug him back. Izuru is my best friend. He's always been there for me and I couldn't be happier for him right now. He's the only one I know who will back me up in anything even if he thinks I'm wrong though Momo has said that is a bad thing. Still, it never stops him from taking my side. He actually makes me think logically when I just want to walk in and beat the shit out of people who piss me off. I'd do anything for him and all he'd have to do is ask.

'Tosh?' he murmurs into my ear.

'Hm?' I acknowledge.

'Thanks,' he says and pulls away to smile at me again. I cock my head to the side.

'I should be thanking you, Izuru,' I say, perplexed at the thanks. 'If it weren't for you, I wouldn't have gone for you-know-who.' He shakes his head.

'No, Tosh,' he says simply. 'You know it's because of you I made an effort to move on. I still love you. But like my brother now. If it weren't for you, I would still be pining for you. Toshiro, you sometimes think you aren't so special. You think that you wouldn't be able to survive without us but you're wrong. Without you, I don't think _I'd _be able to survive. You're beyond special. And you should know how much Gin loves you, Tosh. Words can't even describe it!'

'I know, Izuru,' I say quietly and my eyes slide sideways to catch a glimpse of something that causes my heart to flutter. 'He doesn't have to say it. I see it in his face every time I look at him. And he sees it in mine.'

I glance back at Izuru and start fiddling with my fingers. Confused, Izuru looks where I had just been staring and then looks back at me with a smug look. Gin is standing in front of the school with a bouquet of flowers and smartly dressed in his usual attire of a suit except no tie. He's carelessly unbuttoned the top to give a down to earth look and to be honest, it gives him a sex appeal that is irresistible. However, at that very moment, Hisagi cuts in between Izuru and me.

'Hey, Toshiro! Listen, I didn't finish the physics homework so I was hoping I can borrow your work and -!' he starts but Izuru grabs his arm and starts pulling him away.

'Hisagi! Renji has been looking all over for you!' Izuru cuts in and drags him away from a grateful old me. Hisagi turns a dark shade of red.

'He has?' he glows and lets Izuru pull him along.

'Of course! What? You expect your boyfriend to forget you on Valentine's Day?'

'That's today? Oh my God, I didn't get him anything!'

'Don't worry! Luckily, I know a place we can go to before lessons start so you can get him something from there!'

'Thank you,' I mouth to Izuru who gives me a thumbs-up before disappearing around the corner with a love struck Hisagi. Gin and I are alone now but not completely. We both shift uncomfortably in our places due to the many eyes of people around us as they enter school. Gin approaches me casually and leans down to whisper in my ear. His breath tickles me and it smells like peppermint and chocolate. I lick my lips in anticipation.

'How about we go to my office,' he says softly and I shiver. That tone of his always sends goose bumps coursing up my body. It's always so soothing and yet so seductive I'm drawn to him like a magnet. He didn't even have to tell me where to go. I'd follow him to the ends of the earth and beyond without a care of where we are as long as I am with him. I feel like I'm walking on air as I follow him to his office. I'm so mesmerized by his presence I don't even apologize to Sentaro for stepping on his girlfriend Kiyone's foot. Nothing else seems visible to me right now but this man before me. Once the door to his office is securely locked, he turns around to face me and sighs deeply.

'Happy Valentine's Day, my little neko,' he murmurs and presents me with the bouquet of red, red roses. I accept and inhale their gorgeous scent. My eyes glaze over at the power the smell has over me. I'm a sucker for red roses.

'Happy Valentine's Day to you too, Gin,' I say softly and hand him a small box wrapped in blue paper. When he opens it, he gasps in surprise as he pulls out a thin silver bracelet with a miniature kitten dangling from it. He chuckles softly as he makes to tie it around his wrist.

'So my little neko isn't so far away, eh?' he pouts and frowns when he can't get the clasp to close. It's my turn to laugh as I take his slender hand in my small ones.

I carefully close the clasp and start playing with his shirt sleeve when he then encloses both my hands in his and then pulls me closer. He then closes the distance between our lips and lovingly caresses my hands as he kisses me. I don't know when he stopped holding my hands and moved his own down my torso to my hips. I gasp into the kiss as he digs his nails into my jean clad hips. My body arches forward to his as if craving him. His eyes open a bit and I get a glimpse of those beautiful ruby red eyes that mesmerize me every time I see them. He then eyes his couch, which is now worn out by our constant use of it.

'It's early in the morning,' I grumble but willingly follow like a lamb to a shepherd as he carries me to it and lays me down on my back.

'That's the best time,' Gin smirks as he kisses me tenderly again, running his fingers under my shirt. The feel of his long, delicate fingers against my sensitive skin feels like heaven. I moan as he presses his body against mine and we both know that our bodies have already made up their minds on what they want.

'Valentine's Day sex is the best,' Gin coaxes but he already has me convinced as I let him unzip my pants. I smirk at him as I slowly undo his shirt.

'Make it quick; I got class in ten minutes,' I say firmly though deep down I wish there was more time to prolong this pleasure. Gin laughs softly.

'I'll make every minute worth it,' he whispers seductively and begins planting kisses all over my face, neck and chest.

'Don't you always?' Gin kisses me deeply and passionately. He actually tastes like chocolate and peppermint.

'I love you, Gin.'

'I love you too, Toshiro.'


End file.
